The most astonishing soccer story of the week is not the revelation that Jose Mourinho was once smuggled out of Stamford Bridge in a laundry skip to avoid UEFA officials or even that Queen Elizabeth II is a lifelong fan of Arsenal.

Far more bizarrely comes news from Zagreb that Croatia and Hungary are planning to ask UEFA for compensation to cover the cost of their failed bid to host Euro 2012.

The joint bid received “nul points” from UEFA’s executive committee. The winning bid from Poland and Ukraine received eight of the 12 votes, while Italy got the other four.

The Croats are saying that the two million euros “could have been directed to other important soccer projects.” Perhaps they could have thought of that in the first place. Because if UEFA gives them even a single cent back, wouldn’t every football fan feel justified in going back to get the cost of the ticket refunded every time their team lose?

Or perhaps every club could ask for their 20 million pounds, euros or dollars back if their star forward fails to score the 25 goals they expected him to score when they bought him.

The fans of relegated clubs could go one further and ask for compensation for the mental anguish of seeing their side go down, or to help them cope with the teasing by their work or school mates over their team’s failures.

Hungary and Croatia entered a football competition and lost. Is asking for their money back really a sporting gesture?

Mike Collett is Reuters soccer editor