Okay, listen up, troops! I’ve got your duty assignments for the anti-Gaddafi army!
Smith, you’re riding in a tank. Jones, you’re a bombardier. Williams, you fire rocket-propelled grenades and blow up big stuff all day long. Johnson, you’re on Bike Patrol. Williams, you’re…
Blog Guy, I’ve been trying to get a job in the exciting outdoor food service industry, and there aren’t any. Do you know why?
Yes! That’s what happened to me! I tried getting work peeling potatoes in Ireland, and they gave the position to a presidential candidate, instead!
So, Blog Guy! I guess for top gadget writers like yourself, this is a HUGE day!
Of course. Give me a hint. The new Williams-Sonoma catalog?
Oh, um, sure! I went over at 7 a.m. today but the line was very long, so I bought one from a guy outside. My staff and I are testing it now.
Blog Guy, it’s been TWO WEEKS since you’ve shown us fresh pictures of Paris Hilton! Are there no cameras left for her to stand in front of? Is something wrong? Should we prepare for bad news?
Blog Guy, I need some of your great advice on home entertaining.
Is it something that can be solved by a fancy Williams-Sonoma gadget?
Not this time. I’ve invited some of those anti-Gaddafi soldiers over for a home- cooked dinner, and I’m wondering if there’s anything special I should know. We’ll start with pre-dinner drinks in the living room.
That sounds lovely. Make sure they have a clear line of fire.
Excuse me? Clear line of fire?
You know, they’ll want to use your sofa’s arm rest for their assault weapons, so you should only put one fighter on each piece of furniture.
Then Saudi Arabian Foreign Policy Advisor Adel-Al-Jubeir gestures during a press conference in response to U.S. engineer Paul Marshal Johnson’s beheading at the Saudi Arabian Embassy in Washington, in this June 18, 2004 file photo.
Wow! I must’ve missed the video footage of the beheading at the Embassy.
Man, that’s poorly worded!
Sigh. Yes, that’s a sentence sorely in need of some editing: GBU Editor