You call THAT a Christmas movie?
Are you savoring “It’s a Wonderful Life”? Dreaming of a “White Christmas”? Waiting for a “Miracle on 34th Street”? If so, this blog is not for you. This is about those OTHER holiday movies, a little dark, a little offbeat, that convey the more complex messages of the season.
For those who have absolutely had it with Tiny Tim’s lisping, “And God bless us, every one!” in the various versions of “A Christmas Carol,” try what could be the ultimate bad family holiday movie: “The Lion In Winter.”
You can almost hear the eager screenwriter’s pitch: “Mom’s been locked up with her embroidery for years, the macho-looking eldest son is gay, the youngest is a jerk, the middle son’s a schemer and Dad’s the King of England — watch the fun as they gather for Christmas in France!” And you may especially enjoy the scene where Eleanor of Aquitaine confesses to sleeping with her husband’s father.
There are plenty of others that don’t quite fit the tinsel-and-treacle mold. “Die Hard” and “Die Hard 2: Die Harder,” action flicks both set at Christmastime, definitely work. So does “Stalag 17,” the World War Two prison camp saga where the inmates decorate their pathetic little tree with dogtags.
Depending on how you define a Christmas movie, such classics as “Moonstruck” and “Little Women” count too. In “Moonstruck,” all of New York is dressed up for Christmas, and so is Cher as the mousy bookkeeper-turned-siren. And “Little Women” starts with the girls grumbling about how this darned Civil War means they won’t have any Christmas presents.
This is a game anyone can play — nominations, please, for the most offbeat Christmas movies of all time.

