India Masala

India: More than just call centres

India is the land of colours, sound, and call centres — or at least, that is what Western popular culture has been trying to reinforce over the past few years. “The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel“, starring Judi Dench, is Hollywood’s most recent expedition to India, and it sticks to the formula.

The film is a comedy about a group of British retirees, shunned or underestimated in their own country, rediscovering their desires and ambitions in India.

They are lured to Jaipur, the city of palaces, with an online advertisement of a hotel that promises a life of leisure to the elderly — only to find themselves in a building on its last legs, run by an incompetent, hyperactive Sonny, played by Dev Patel of “Slumdog Millionaire“. Patel’s love interest is a modern young girl who works at a call centre.

Made on a modest budget, the film is a commercial success and is inching towards the $100 million mark in ticket sales — a remarkable run for a movie that has senior citizens as its main cast.

Like other Hollywood films such as “Outsourced” and “Slumdog Millionaire“, this one ascribes mainly two roles to the local population — the poor, downtrodden Indian and the English-speaking, call-centre agent — and therein lies a problem.

While it is true that India is an outsourcing hub, it is not as if every college graduate aspires to make sales over the telephone. Only about 350,000 Indians are employed as call centre agents — a minuscule percentage in a country with nearly 1.2 billion people. We have many more doctors, lawyers or school teachers, to name a few professions.

Neither is becoming a call centre agent the most desired or prestigious career choice because it could mean a lifetime of night shifts and having to deal with abusive customers.

Arjun – The Warrior Prince: Hit-and-miss

No other tale is as familiar to me as the Mahabharat. Whether it was stories heard in my childhood, animated books that were gifted, or watching B. R. Chopra’s television series over Sunday breakfast, this epic is ingrained in the psyche.

Which is why, when a movie about Arjun comes along, one looks forward to the opportunity to relive some of those stories. Directed by Arnab Chaudhuri, “Arjun – The Warrior Prince” tells the story of the Mahabharat from the point of view of Arjun, the third of the Pandava brothers.

The film is told largely in flashback, and begins with the “eye of the bird” story — where Arjun tells his tutor Dronacharya that he can only see the eye of the bird he is to shoot, while his brothers and cousins describe the trees around and the colour of the bird’s feathers.

The film establishes Arjun’s sense of purpose and his skills even before the titles, but then seems to run out of things to say. The plot meanders along, and skips several important events in Arjun’s life, including Draupadi’s disrobing scene, and his relationship with Lord Krishna.

As a result, “Arjun – The Warrior Prince” appears disjointed, and given that this is a familiar story, one may feel a bit cheated.

The animation in the film is good, but certainly not at par with Disney films internationally, which is made even more obvious by the promo of the new Pixar film “Brave” screened just before the film.

Some scenes, such as the one in which Arjun aims for the eye of a fish by looking at its reflection in the water are well done.

Department: Mr Varma, please spare us the trauma

In my head, I always imagine Ram Gopal Varma, sitting in his office, legs up on the table, going through a checklist on the last day of a film shoot. Hyperactive camera angle – check. Lots of fake blood – check. Added some element of “Satya”, “Company” or “Sarkar” to the film – check. Leading ladies showing off cleavage – check.

How else do you explain a film like “Department”? That someone (Varma) thought they could make a film with such tacky production values, a convoluted and weak script, and some scenes that could be straight out of a soft-porn flick, and still convince a major studio to fund it and market it as a A-grade movie, is baffling.

The film is about two police officers (Sanjay Dutt and Rana Daggubati), who are asked to to set up a hit squad in order to “finish” the Mumbai underworld. Their target is the eccentric Savatiya (Vijay Raaz) and his gang.

Savatiya is also under attack from two of his own gang members — DK (Abhimanyu Singh) and his girlfriend (played by Madhu Shalini) — both of whom want Savatiya to retaliate against the police.

When powerful local politician Sarjerao Gaekwad (Amitabh Bachchan) enters the equation, both Shivnarayan (Daggubati) and Mahadev (Dutt) realise that things aren’t what they seem.

Varma uses liberal doses of plot lines from earlier films like “Sarkar” and “Satya”, but re-hashes them to such an extent that you might be forgiven for thinking “Department” is a spoof. He uses his trademark camera angles and ear-splitting background noise to create drama, but ends up making it caricaturish. There are times when you can see the film from the point of view of a tea pot, a newspaper and even the striker on the carrom board.

Given the look and feel of the film, you’d think the director had sleepwalked through the schedule. Characters, especially those of DK and his girlfriend are so over-the-top that they are more funny than scary, and except for Amitabh Bachchan, who seems to know what he’s doing, the rest of the cast resemble a deer caught in the headlights. At some point during the second half, you lose all sense of the plot, the characters’s motives and where the film is headed.

Bollywood drama – off screen and in parliament

You cannot escape Bollywood and the drama that comes with it, not even in the hallowed environs of the Rajya Sabha.

On Monday, as actress Rekha, the newest member of the upper house of India’s parliament took oath, the focus — at least that of the cameras, was on another, older member. Rekha’s short swearing-in ceremony was interspersed with several shots of a very grim-looking Jaya Bachchan.

Anyone watching the five-minute swearing-in ceremony, would have been forgiven for thinking they were watching a Bollywood awards ceremony, where the camera pans to a Shahid Kapur when a Kareena Kapoor is dancing or a Ranbir Kapoor when Deepika Padukone is performing.

It seems Jaya Bachchan hasn’t taken too kindly to that camerawork, complaining to Rajya Sabha chairman and Vice-President Hamid Ansari about the attempt to “sensationalise” news.

Given the amount of Bollywood gossip over the decades, it would seem natural that cameras would go into overdrive if the two women were in the same room. But what if that room is not just any room, but the upper house of parliament? Does that rule still hold? Can Rajya Sabha TV function like any other television channel?

Whatever the case, it seems like this week has been one of dipping into the past for our parliamentarians. Whether it is a decades-old cartoon, or a decades-old incident, we seem to be happier reliving the past.

LIVE Movie Chat: “Department”

Ishaqzaade: A rugged love story

At first glance, Habib Faisal’s “Ishaqzaade” has a lot going for it — there’s some great casting, good direction and performances. The milieu is different — arid, rugged, rural India and this is about feisty, gutsy lovers who are smart enough not to view the world through rose-tinted glasses.

At the halfway mark, Faisal sets up the film so tantalisingly, you can only wonder what surprises he plans on throwing at you. But the second half is somewhat of a let-down. The story goes haywire, characters act out of character, and the whole film sort of ends in a whimper, when it should have ended with a bang — which is how it starts.

Faisal’s introductory scene is very impactful. Two school kids from a small town swearing, calling the other all sorts of names and even hurling stones — setting up the animosity between the two protagonists very well. Zoya (Parineeti Chopra) as the fiery daughter of the local Muslim MLA, with political ambitions of her own, is perfectly cast. Arjun Kapoor plays Parma, the brash grandson of Zoya’s father’s main political rival.

Both Zoya and Parma have every reason to hate each other, but when they end up falling in love, there are many repercussions — both political and personal.

To say any more would be to spoil the plot, but Faisal knows his characters very well. He knows this village and its people and how things work. There are some lovely moments, especially between the two leads and their chemistry is crackling. Faisal also makes telling points about the politics of small-town India where votes are decided on the basis of caste and religion and family honour is above all else.

But these components don’t come together to form a great film, and the sum of its parts is greater than the whole, at least as far as “Ishaqzaade” goes. Faisal falters in the second half and it doesn’t turn out to be the film that it set out to be.

But there are plenty of positives, and Parineeti Chopra is the biggest one. She is crackling in the film, and one of the main reasons to watch it. Here is a heroine who has spunk and isn’t afraid to show it and has the acting chops to play that role to the hilt. Arjun Kapoor makes an assured debut, and although you find him trying a little too hard at times, he has an easy screen presence and might remind you of Abhishek Bachchan in his early days. A special word for Gauhar Khan, who shines in a small role as a dancer who helps Parma and Zoya.

Dangerous Ishhq: Death is not the end

“What is my soul trying to tell me?” Karisma Kapoor asks a character in ‘Dangerous Ishhq’. It’s a serious moment in the film, one that is expected to lead to a major plot point, but all you can do is try hard not to burst out laughing.

All the characters in Vikram Bhatt’s latest 3D project are trying so hard to “act” in a film that has inane dialogue, a ridiculous storyline and absolutely no honesty at heart — that their acting rings hollow.

Karisma Kapoor, in her comeback film, plays one of her most lacklustre characters, that of supermodel Sanjana who gives up a flourishing career (in Paris, no less) so that she can be with her boyfriend Rohan (Rajniesh Duggall), the son of a rich industrialist. When unknown men kidnap Rohan, Sanjana starts “seeing” incidents from her past lives (three of them), giving her clues to Rohan’s whereabouts.

With the help of police officer ACP Singh (played by Jimmy Shergill), she helps track down her fiancé, firm in the belief that events from past lives are still relevant. “Dangerous Ishhq” harks back to the tried and tested Bollywood formula of rebirth and reincarnation, but Bhatt attempts to give it a slick look with 3D.

Unfortunately, the film has so many plot holes the entire effort falls flat. Characters routinely mouth dialogue that is unintentionally hilarious. Try as you might, it’s hard to take this kind of stuff seriously.

Karisma Kapoor, returning to the big screen after several years, looks botoxed and obsessed with her high heels and make-up. Her diction in scenes requiring Urdu and Rajasthani is so laboured, you wish she’d give it up and break into English instead. Duggall, on the other hand, doesn’t do much except give pained looks from time to time. The chemistry between the two of them, so important for romance movies, is non-existent.

This is one of those movies that’s so bad it’s good. Gather a bunch of friends and laugh your heart out. If you are looking for a serious movie-watching experience, stay far away.

India not shining — on prime-time TV

Film-maker Madhur Bhandarkar said during an interview that “Indian audiences don’t like to see reality on screen, they see enough of that in life”. Bhandarkar is known for making “real” films, but he might have hit the nail on the head. Perhaps that is why Indian TV doesn’t normally depict “reality” on screen — preferring instead to hide behind yards of brocade sarees and scheming mothers-in-law and coy brides.

On Sunday though, Bollywood actor Aamir Khan chose to tell the story of a different kind of Indian woman — one that doesn’t get to live. On the first episode of his new talk show “Satyamev Jayate”, Khan chose to talk about female foeticide, a rampant issue in India, where the sex ratio is currently at its lowest since independence.

The 47-year-old interviewed women who had been forced to abort their girl children, reporters who had conducted sting operations on the issue and researchers who had done considerable work in the field.

As Khan himself noted, countless people have worked to save these little girls. I wonder how they must feel when they see an issue so close to their hearts being discussed on prime-time television on a show that’s already being talked about.

Does the fact that Aamir Khan is talking about it make female foeticide a problem that will go away soon? Do Indians not know that their daughters are being killed every day? As Bhandarkar said, don’t they know enough of reality already? Do we need to put it on television as well?

Given the response to his show on social networking sites, the answer might be a yes. Ratings for the show are yet to come in, but “SatyamevJayate” was the top trending topic on Twitter all day, with many viewers crediting Khan for creating awareness about issues that need to be discussed.

This is a departure from the normal reality TV format that Indian networks follow — most of the shows are competitions or voyeuristic endeavours like “Bigg Boss”. A talk show format on prime-time television hasn’t been tried, but the Rupert Murdoch-owned Star TV has bet big on this show — investing heavily in promotions and Khan’s reported fee of 30 million rupees per show.

Jannat 2: This sequel is not paradise regained

In the first ten minutes of Kunal Deshmukh’s second instalment of the “Jannat” series, the director sets up his principal characters, establishes a romance angle and even adds a song for good measure. He also manages to inject no originality or freshness in any of these facets of the film, with the result that “Jannat 2” never really takes off, maintaining a staid pace throughout its two-and-half-hour duration.

Deshmukh borrows nothing from the original “Jannat”, except for his lead hero and the vague notion of a protagonist who seeks heaven on earth — mostly in the arms of a coy lady.

Emraan Hashmi plays Sonu, a smart-talking small-time crook, who deals in firearms. When he comes across a angst-ridden cop (Randeep Hooda) who urges him to turn into a police informer, Sonu agrees, hoping it’ll keep him out of trouble with the police.

When Sonu falls in love and decides to get married to a coy doctor named Jhanvi (newcomer Esha Gupta), he doesn’t realise his past will come back to haunt him.

Deshmukh keeps his story pretty straight and simple — sometimes overly so. The gun trade, Hooda’s anger and his desire for revenge are explained away rather superficially.

The dialogue is sprinkled liberally with lots of swear words that seem to have been added just for the shock effect — they lend absolutely nothing to the film otherwise. Deshmukh sticks to the Bhatt formula — lots of skin show, provocative dialogue and Emraan Hashmi.

Unfortunately, the whole film has the distinct look of a college play — and Deshmukh’s amateurish direction comes across rather glaringly. The film is too long and none of the lead actors manage to inject any energy in their roles. Hooda, especially, is too over-the-top to be believable.

Fatso: Insipid slice of modern life

The modern Indian youth has it easy. Very easy. They party, they romance, and they make marriage plans without ever having to worry about their careers and how they would pay their bills. Or at least this is the version Bollywood has been trying to shove down our throats since “Dil Chahta Hai“.

Rajat Kapoor’s “Fatso” is no different. Nandini (Gul Panag) and Naveen (Purab Kohli) are an urban, handsome, young couple. They are also very modern. Their modernity is depicted through public displays of affection, sex before marriage and English dialogue.

They party, wear fashionable clothes and eat out at chic restaurants. But somehow, they never have to worry about money. For them, life is one smooth, work-less ride.

It’s also a very boring one — a word that more or less sums up the entire movie.

But our perfect couple’s relationship does hit a speed bump, when the carefree and athletic Naveen is killed in a road accident just before his marriage to Nandini. Unfortunately, authorities in the limbo between life and after-life have goofed up. It was not Naveen, but his best buddy, ‘fatso’ Sudeep (Ranvir Shorey) who was supposed to die in the crash. Naveen, whose body has already been cremated, is given a chance to return to earth via Sudeep’s body, so he can sort his love life.

The on-screen couple’s chemistry is as smouldering as a doorknob and the dialogues, especially the ones in English, are stilted. The story, which seems loosely inspired from the American TV series “Drop Dead Diva“, is insipid and unfocussed.

Gul Panag’s expression remains unchanged through joy or sorrow, and Kohli is cute but fails to gain the audience’s empathy. Shorey is the only saving grace in this flat, unexciting project. He effortlessly portrays the awkward, self-effacing ‘fatso’ — but the movie doesn’t really dwell on his obesity or its embarrassing implications, making the audience wonder why the film is named so.