India Masala

Jodi Breakers: The ‘Headachers’

‘Tis the season for romance — at least in Bollywood. After “Ek Main aur Ekk Tu“ and “Ekk Deewana Tha“ this month, comes Ashwini Chaudhary’s “Jodi Breakers“, another film that attempts to bring together romance and comedy and hopes to leave you with a warm, fuzzy feeling in your tummy. And fails spectacularly, I might add.

R. Madhavan plays Sid, a divorcee, who after his split turns into a divorce specialist, “breaking up” couples when one of them wants out. Bipasha Basu plays Sonali, his partner who, of course, falls hopelessly in love with him.

When the duo are entrusted with the job of “breaking up” a rich businessman (Milind Soman) and his girlfriend (Dipannita Sharma), Sid neglects to mention that he has a personal interest in this case, hurting Sonali and causing a rift between the two.

Chaudhary’s brand of humour is somewhere between silly and crass. Everyone, from Omi Vaidya (who plays a Casanova) to Helen, playing a shrill-voiced grandmother, is trying too hard to be funny, which is very difficult given that the jokes aren’t funny at all.

The film is peppered with inane dialogues and Sid’s constant references to his beloved car, which is called Horny. This is one of those films that had the germ of a good idea but got horribly lost in translation.

Of the cast, Milind Soman and Dipannita Sharma look great together and actually have some chemistry, something that the lead pair is missing. When you see the four together, you might be forgiven for forgetting that it’s Sonali and Sid’s love story we are supposed to be watching.

Madhavan, unfortunately, doesn’t look the part and has no chemistry with Bipasha, which means you hardly care when they break up or get together. Vaidya and Helen are more irritating than Priyanka Chopra was in “Agneepath” and have the worst dialogues in the film.

Players: Good action, bad acting

You cannot help but compare the last film of 2011 with the first film of 2012. Both have a lot in common — “Don 2″ and “Players” are both heist films, both borrow heavily from Hollywood movies and have their share of over-the-top cheesy moments. There is just one thing that sets “Players” apart — there’s a lot more action in this one.

Director duo Abbas-Mustan make sure there’s plenty to keep you on the edge of your seat, and even though the film drags on longer than it should, you are still not looking to bolt from the hall.

Borrowing from the premise of “The Italian Job”, “Players” tells the story of Charlie Fernandes (Abhishek Bachchan), who plans to rob gold bars worth billions of dollars while it is being transferred from one country to another by train.

He enlists the help of hardened criminal Victor Braganza (Vinod Khanna), who helps him put together a team of a hacker, illusionist, make-up artist and Riya (Bipasha Basu), Charlie’s trusted partner in earlier crimes.

They pull off the heist after an edge-of-the-seat sequence but that’s not quite the end of the story. I won’t reveal anymore because not everyone’s watched “The Italian Job”, but suffice it to say the directors add enough songs, comic tracks and corny dialogues to ensure they’ve “tailored” it to Indian tastes.

There are several plotholes, the acting is plain vanilla and you can see the myriad twists coming a mile away. What saves this film is that it’s styled well, shot well and has enough chases and high-octane sequences to keep you interested.

One of the biggest problem areas is the acting — not a single person from the ensemble cast stands out. It’s all one-note, except for Neil Nitin Mukesh who is marginally better than the others. Special mention for Sonam Kapoor, who needs to start thinking about her laboured acting and stop thinking about her styling.

Dhoni gets hitched; celebrities tweet best wishes

As one of India’s most eligible bachelors tied the knot late on Sunday night, you could almost hear the sound of a million hearts breaking.

But along with that, you could also hear the sound of a million fingers typing furiously on their phones, so that they could tweet their best wishes to Indian cricket captain Mahendra Singh Dhoni and his bride.

Everyone from Bollywood’s Shilpa Shetty to Bipasha Basu, to teammate Yuvraj Singh “tweeted” their best wishes to the captain. (Congratulate Dhoni here)

“Got to know mahi is getting married! Congratulations dhoni and sakshi hope u have a great life together,” Yuvraj Singh tweeted.

Yuvraj and most of Dhoni’s team-mates did not make it to the wedding but actor John Abraham is said to have attended the hush-hush affair.

Media reports also suggest that Abraham and girlfriend Bipasha Basu were to host a reception-cum-party in Mumbai for the newlyweds, but Basu denied the news.

“I have kept no reception for Dhoni on the 7th. It’s semi-finals (FIFA World Cup) on that day so we are just watching football and there is no Mahi (nickname for Dhoni) coming pls (sic),” she said in a text message.

IFFI 2009: Rituparno Ghosh on ‘Sab Charitro Kalponik’

The Bengali film, starring Bipasha Basu and Prosenjit, explores the relationship between a poet and his wife.

Ghosh, who won a National Award for the English film “The Last Lear“, said he was unhappy that his Bengali projects did not get as much publicity as mainstream movies.

A date with Bipasha Basu awaits Vijender if he wins gold

There are a lot of perks to winning an Olympic medal in India (just ask Abhinav Bindra). State governments offer you lakhs, sometimes even crores of rupees, you get a lifetime railway pass, visit the Prime Minister and Sonia Gandhi, and even get patted on the cheek by President Pratibha Patil (hey, that’s a perk).

But boxer Vijender Kumar, who is in the semifinals of the middleweight category at Beijing, has one incentive no one, not even Prime Minister Manmohan Singh or President Patil can offer him — a hot date with his favourite actress Bipasha Basu.

When told she was Kumar’s favourite, Basu told reporters she would go on a hot date with the Haryanvi lad if he won a gold medal for the country.

There’s two ways of looking at this. Kumar can either take this as the opportunity of a lifetime and give it his all, or be so overawed with the prospect of a dream date that he loses focus.

If I were Kumar though, I would focus on the medal, not Bipasha Basu. After all, the medal is not going to run into John Abraham’s arms the minute dinner is over. This one will be for keeps.

Join us in wishing Vijender Kumar best of luck.

Bachna Ae Haseeno: Ranbir comes out shining

Dreamy locales, designer threads, wedding sequences, racy numbers and a happy ending — Yash Raj Films finally got the formula right.”Bachna Ae Haseeno” has all this and more. It’s a formula film no doubt, but it has its heart in the right place.

So when you are introduced to Raj Sharma, an incorrigible flirt and lovable rascal with a serious commitment phobia — you kind of take to him immediately.

He meets girls, makes promises of everlasting love and then disappears. First, its Mahi (played by Minissha Lamba), a sweet Punjabi girl he meets on a trip to Switzerland, then Radhika (played by Bipasha Basu), an ambitious model.

Third time around, our hero is struck really hard — when he meets Gayatri (Deepika Padukone). They drive around Sydney at odd hours, dance around exotic beaches (watch out for the beautifully shot ‘Khuda Jaane’ track) and of course fall in love. Now here comes the twist, which of course we won’t tell you.

Let me just say that a turn of events prompts Raj to revisit Mahi and Radhika to make amends. The rest of the film focuses on this mission.

It’s obvious right from the first frame that this is Ranbir Kapoor’s film through and through — and he comes out shining. His first film (“Saawariya”) didn’t showcase his comic talent and it’s quite obvious Kapoor has lots of it. He pulls off the scenes with the right amount of goofiness and innocence.

The three leading ladies perform well and look great — Yash Raj heroines always do, so that’s not a big surprise. Deepika and Ranbir’s chemistry is crackling on screen but Bipasha and Ranbir also make a great pair.