Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
But Santa, you can’t swim!
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‘Twas the night before Christmas, and out on the crick,
I saw a big fat guy – it must be Saint Nick!
Giving out gifts, his relatable craft,
Delivering stuff by inflatable raft!
He said, “I’ve got toys for your son and your daughter,
“They even get gifts if they live on the water!
“Every good child gets what he deserves!”
Then he shook when he laughed, like a bowl of preserves…
His eyes, how they twinkled, not at all vapid,
He shouted, “It’s time now to head for the rapids!”
But I heard him exclaim, as he waved toward the docks,
“Merry Christmas to all! HEY! WATCH OUT FOR THOSE ROCKS!”
A man dressed as Santa Claus and children participate in a rafting event in Indonesia, December 22, 2007. REUTERS/Crack Palinggi
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“Relatable.” Way to reach!
Where’s Jack ‘kinda cooler today,’ Mrs. Victoria’s Secret Clause, and the eight middling-sized orangutans headed up by Rogo Phosphorescent Snout?
Santa doesn’t have a care in the world about his weight but is surprisingly concerned about his capsize.
It’s harder work but much less stressful than roeing snails.
Hey, “relatable” is a word, you can look it up. Besides, it’s Christmas Eve. Who the hell is going to read this, anyway?
Robert?!
Thanks man, for the laugh, I sort of needed that.