Memo to fashion show staff: Please pay attention, because we have some special challenges for the show this season. I know you’ll come through for me.
Now, the only venue available is the city’s biggest tanning salon, and there’s no way to turn down the lights. I think we can get around that little problem by spritzing everyone with sunblock, and making people wear sunglasses. Look, it’s a free tan, okay?
Two of our big backers insist on getting to leer from velvet seats at a front-row table, with cognac Big Gulps. Well, no, I wouldn’t exactly describe them as debonair gentlemen in tuxedos, but deal with it.
They also gave us a case of leftover red holiday candles. I know, it’s moronic to light candles in a tanning salon, but maybe nobody will notice, what with all the sunglasses, and the sunblock oozing down their faces and everything…
Related posts: The Moor the merrier and Tortilla art sells like hotcakes…
Model displays a creation by Ukrainian designer Hristina Bobkova during fashion week in Kiev March 15, 2008. REUTERS/ Gleb Garanich
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7 comments so far
Except for the green gloves, this actually looks like an outfit someone might wear. YIKES! All the Japanese fashion designers must be horrified with Hristina Bobkova. Hristina obviously didn’t graduate from the Salvador Dali School of Fashion Design.
- Posted by Dee T“I think she’s hot, don’t you Boris?”
- Posted by John C Abell“Vladimir. That’s a dude.”
Cognac big gulps. Robert, you closet innovator!
- Posted by Shawn HendricksThees ees fasheeone? Wair air zee steelts? Wair air zee bare-legs men undairnees zee dress? Sacre bleu! Zees tkchroolee muzz bee zee Ookranio.
- Posted by Shawn HendricksBeats cinemapubs all to heck.
- Posted by Shawn HendricksI see green rubber toilet gloves. Can toilet brushes be far from the catwalk? I think not! We have seen smoking and light-emitting fashions but when will we see dripping, dust-poofing or goop-glopping styles? When we finally see dry ice fashion on the runway I imagine it will truly sublime.
- Posted by Shawn HendricksI asked for a simple menu ten minutes ago but the waitresses just keep walking past like we don’t exist. I’ve had it up to here. I’m going to Red Lobster. You coming?
- Posted by Shawn Hendricks