Leggo of the sofa, ma, we’re winnin’ this race!
I’ve been holding back a bit, but I may as well take the lid off. In some deprived places they compensate for a lack of TV by racing furniture. We’ve had credible reports of people racing beds and chairs, sometimes while listening to OOMPAH music.
My God! It’s worse than I ever imagined! Make it stop! It gets even worse. In both reports, people actually showed up to spectate.
No, that would be expectorate. They went to be spectators, to cheer the people racing furniture. And that’s where no cable television leads.