News, but not the serious kind
John, this place is a PIGSTY!
I’ve written about all the ice cream that presidential candidates get to eat, and some readers got the idea that campaigning is a great gig, just flying around for free and eating treats.
But wait. You also have to go to state fairs and stuff, and act like pigs are interesting, and take your rich wife along and even SHE has to act like they’re interesting, and say stuff like, “John, that’s SOME pig, isn’t it?” while she’s thinking, “I could REALLY use a porkchop about now!”
And then you have to listen to some pig guy tell your wife how really this animal is a boar , which is a pig that hasn’t been castrated, and then your wife has to be like, “Isn’t that interesting, John?” when she’s really thinking, “Look what I just stepped in! Get me the frick out of this stinkhole!”
Of course, all these quotes are made up, because I wasn’t there, but I’ll bet I’m not very far off.
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Republican presidential candidate John McCain and his wife Cindy look at the winning boar of the Big Boar contest during a campaign stop at the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines, August 8, 2008. REUTERS/Stephen Mally