It’s a split-level, with a half-bath…

October 14, 2008

split-300.jpgA riddle: How can a man leave his better half, but also take his better half with him?

Yeah, it turns out this dude split up with the wife, and thanks to the magic of saws and chisels, he left with half the house, as our video report shows.

I’m going to be mature and not beat this one to death with cheap, easy puns, but if readers want to do that in comments, be my guest!

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Was his name Arfur?

Posted by tessi | Report as abusive

Strange and sad. You have to wonder what prompted the husband to cut off relations and leave. If this family is like many American families, the argument probably started over something trivial, like how the Missus made morning coffe. Perhaps she put skim milk in his, rather than half-and-half.

Posted by Dr. Doll | Report as abusive

Nice, Dr. Doll! I wondered where you were going with that, but you really delivered.

Actually, I believe there is a bit more to the story. It turns out the guy counsels recovering addicts, and wanted to start a halfway house.

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

Looks to me like it was an investor’s half baked idea to have two houses for the price of one. . .

Posted by EngineeringGuy | Report as abusive

Wow, only half as many half-baked jokes as I would have expected.

I guess the husband was of two minds on what to do with the house…

Posted by David | Report as abusive

Oh, the husband was of one mind in what to do. His determination is quite clear. What the legal authorities will do is another matter. I understand that the property-division proceedings regarding the house have been bifurcated.

Posted by Dr. Doll | Report as abusive

Plague on both their houses, I say.

Posted by Shakespeare | Report as abusive

Eddie, I want half!

Posted by Konny | Report as abusive

Despite the fact that he over-reacted initially, I hear their chances of getting back together are 50/50…

Posted by Stats Man | Report as abusive

Oh, you don’t know the half of it…

Posted by The guy in the story | Report as abusive

obviously it was split decision!

Posted by Eric Slaughter | Report as abusive

Konny- the “Eddie, I want half!” is the best comment. ever.

Posted by boomhauer | Report as abusive

“two have and two hold”…

Posted by The priest who married them | Report as abusive

So is the old cliche ‘a house divided cannot stand’, not even half-right? I wonder if it was her duplicity that caused him to cut & run, or was she half-hearted in her love and two-timed him? Now that he has split and their happy home is in pieces, the children should be twice glad that his name isn’t Solomon. What a half-wit!

Posted by M. Twain | Report as abusive

Hey M. Twain, good stuff! House divided … Solomon … Cut and run… You should be a writer, unless that name is already taken….

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

I wonder who got the bathroom. Maybe it had a half bath in it.
It was clearly a split level house to begin with, with one half in Panama and the other half in Honduras

Posted by wizardovoz | Report as abusive

Why were the stairs left?
Cause the other half got the front door?

Posted by W. Farmer | Report as abusive

“a george divided among itself CANNOT stand….” – seinfeld

Posted by veronica | Report as abusive

well now they each are ready when half-assed cousins come to visit…

Posted by bonnie | Report as abusive


Only if the outhouse was a one- rather than a two-holer!

Posted by Dr. Doll | Report as abusive

… to halve and to hold…

Posted by M | Report as abusive

i hope that he got the better half.

looks like he saved money on a lawyer for now.

Posted by DAVE ZINN | Report as abusive

Looks like he was half out of his mind!

Posted by Beef | Report as abusive