A large coffee and 60 drums of Napalm, please
I may as well not hide my feelings. I don’t know if you saw Britney Spears’ act on TV today, but it was another sign of the coming Apocalypse, an example of decaying moral values in this country.
I know you’re saying, “Shut up! She put on an awesome show, going through a ring of fire in a sexy outfit!”
Yes, but she did it about 8 o’clock in the morning! She had to get up at like 6 a.m., pull on fishnet stockings, load big cans of Napalm into her station wagon and drive over to set up the act.
Who does stuff like this at that hour, when decent folks are sucking back scalding coffee, watching Krispy Kreme doughnuts come down the conveyor, or calling in sick?
When I was growing up, we had only one firm rule in our house: NO rings of fire until noon, no matter what! So don’t come crying to me if your kid burns down the house early tomorrow, trying to be just like Britney.
Singer Britney Spears performs on ABC’s “Good Morning America” in New York December 2, 2008. REUTERS/Lucas Jackson