My shoes match! I have to go change!

December 11, 2008

Okay, fashion design staffers, there’s a recession on. We have to find a way to squeeze more money out of teenage girls, because they’ll buy ANYTHING!

Pay attention. We’re telling them the cool new look is those silly hats bullfighters wear. Yes, I’m serious. Now, Lenny has come up with some goofy, hideous dresses that will sell like hotcakes.

But here’s the best part. This is what makes me a certified genius! We tell them the new trend in footwear is to wear two DIFFERENT shoes! That means every girl has to buy TWO pairs just to get ONE pair! Twice as much money for us!

Okay, Emma, send in those six chicks from the mall, and let’s see if there’s ANYTHING they won’t put on!

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Spanish bullfighter Julian Lopez Escober in a 2007 file photo. REUTERS/ Eloy Alonso

Models present the latest creations for teenagers by Indonesian fashion designer Lenny Agustine in Jakarta, December 3, 2008. REUTERS/Dadang Tri

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Sorry to disappoint you but you are no genius at all. Wearing two different shoes had been “fashionable” in the 80s & 90s

Posted by Jeanette | Report as abusive

Well, if all the skirts open up the way the one on the far left does, at least they’ll all be able to float gently down to earth in the event that they have to jump without a parachute…

Posted by Bandage | Report as abusive

Yeah, they stole the two-different-shoes thing from Punky Brewster, who stole it from 18th-century France. There’s nothing new. Nothing.

Posted by Heather | Report as abusive

Finally, a use for all those crappy doilies that Grandma made…

Posted by K | Report as abusive

Slight problem with the math. If they buy two pairs of shoes, they still get two pairs of shoes, not one, even if they wear them “odd”.

Posted by StevenC | Report as abusive