News, but not the serious kind
Who was that masked man? And where’s my Rolex?
Hello, police? I need to report a robbery. My department store was robbed today. They took a bunch of wristwatches from our jewelry department.
What? Did I notice every person on the street today? Now that you mention it, they WERE all wearing surgical masks! Oh, right - the flu.
So you can’t DO anyhing? What do you mean it could could get worse?
Readers, we take you now to the operating wing of a posh plastic surgery practice.
“Doctor, you’ve got a busy schedule today. Here are your sharp scalpels and your anesthetic.
“I don’t mean to second-guess you, doctor, but are you SURE that patient wants an ear put where her nose should be?
“Doctor! I’ve never seen REVERSE liposuction! How much fat are you going to pump into that skinny model?
“Well look who’s here! Welcome home, Dr. Hayek! Do you need to scrub? I see you already have a mask…”
Below: Doctor uses mobile phone during evacuation of a hospital after an earthquake in Mexico City April 27, 2009. Hundreds of people evacuated buildings in the capital, many of them wearing surgical face masks due to the deadly swine flu. REUTERS/Henry Romero