One man’s way of avoiding a layoff?

June 30, 2009

Quick quiz for tough economic times. What are some effective things you can do to help prevent being laid off?

a)  Be a model worker. Don’t surf the Internet, hang around the coffee machine, leave early, etc.

b) Take on extra responsibilities and learn new skills; make yourself indispensable.

c)  Offer constructive suggestions for cutting costs in other ways.

d)  Have your boss killed.

Yeah, there’s nothing funny about that last option. We have a story about a guy who was arrested after the police suspected he hired a contract killer to murder his boss in a desperate bid to avoid being laid off.

It seems the suspect, through his sister, contracted a team of six Colombians who planned and carried out the killing of the boss, who had planned to lay off the arrested man as part of a restructuring project.

What can you, as an employer, do to protect yourself from something like this?

Well, before you make your downsizing plans you may want to ask all your employees if they know any hitmen. Make it sound real casual. You also might want to find a better euphemism than “restructuring project,” which doesn’t fool anybody these days.

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Former shipyard workers wearing masks hurl objects at police during a protest in Gijon, northern Spain, in photos taken last month. REUTERS photos by Eloy Alonso

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7 comments

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During these tough times, it can be hard to find a job. I found this great resource called http://resumebucket.com where you can post your resume online for free and land a job quickly!

Posted by Grant | Report as abusive

Dude…

I believe you got kinda spammed… ^

Posted by tim | Report as abusive

Mmmm… spam

Actually not spam, ResumeBucket is a solid site… I know 2 people who have got jobs from it..

Any tool in this economy to help people get jobs is a good tool

Signor, not only are you fired but you throw like a girl.

Posted by Shawn Hendricks | Report as abusive

Um, any word about the six Columbians? Just asking, man.

Posted by Shawn Hendricks | Report as abusive

A member of the crack Gijon naval Police creeps up on a rioter, using state of the art electronic camouflaging, bought from the CIA. Note how he blends in, virtually invisible to the naked eye.

Posted by floppagrunnybarcus | Report as abusive