Just get a frickin’ pencil, Debbie!

August 26, 2009

If you’re like me – and I’m sorry if that’s the case – then you get frequent queries like this one via Facebook. It seems that Debbie Somebody wants to put my birthday on her calendar. Is that okay with me, it asks?

Sure, I guess so. I mean, Debbie probably wants to remember to get me something nice, maybe even have a surprise party for me.

But then I get this next message, which says that in order order to do this, Debbie’s calendar application needs to pull my profile info, my photos, my friends’ info and “other content.”

I have to presume “other content” means my sex change medical records, my birth certificate from Kenya and that 1970 photo of me in a Nehru jacket.

Jeez Debbie, WTF?  Isn’t it possible for you to just grab a pencil and write, “Bob’s birthday, August 5,” on your wall?

I mean, if you watch TV, you remember that Tony Soprano whacked Big Pussy Bonpensiero for giving up a LOT less information than your application wants from me. Watch your back, Deb.

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Left: “Sopranos” actors Vincent Pastore (Big Pussy Bonpensiero) (L) and Frank Vincent in 2004 file photo. REUTERS

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Bob, how odd it is that your birthday is the day after mine! Of course, there are a few years that separate us…but I can’t fault you for being born in prehistoric times.

Posted by K | Report as abusive

Prehistoric times? Huh? You kids get out of my yard!

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

Yeah, Facebook applications are getting a bit onerous….

Posted by Mark Baker-Wright | Report as abusive

…turn your head to the left and cough…now to the right

Posted by Dino Myers | Report as abusive

What? Your birthday has already passed?!

I could have sworn that my Facebook espionage application said -September- 5th! Silly me, seeing seeing an eight and thinking a nine!

Now I suppose that I will have to return all those “gifts” and deposit the money back into your checking account. I should also probably call the kidnappers and tell them that the party’s off.

Oh well, better luck next year!

Posted by Aaron | Report as abusive

Aww, sorry I missed your birthday Bob.

Hey – if you add this neat new application on Facebook, I can send you a belated birthday gift!

What do you mean it wants to pull all your information? Of course this pixelated image of a teddy bear needs to know your measurements and IQ before it can be sent to you. Don’t you understand technology Bob? Aren’t you paid to work on the interweb?

Posted by Little Miss Random | Report as abusive

I accidently might have sent something like this before I was trying to play farmville!!! one of my friends asked me coz I already knew her birthday anyway.. i blocked that application later… and changed my privacy settings :)

Posted by Caglar | Report as abusive

Robert, I guess that admitting the sex change and the existence of the Kenyan birth certificate are relatively lesser crimes.

What I find truly disturbing is that even after almost 40 years, you come to admit to wearing a Nehru jacket. We all have committed “pechés de jeunesse” (youth sins) but there are certain things that are better left unsaid, or at least, kept in the dark!!

Shame on you!

Posted by M | Report as abusive

Its about time you grabbed those flipping stupid facebook applications for scrutiny !!

Way to go. :)

Posted by Fawad | Report as abusive

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