Human evolution, the sexy way

September 30, 2009

Blog Guy, I have a question about the whole Darwinism/creationism debate, and I know you are educated in both science and theology.

My problem is, I think both of those theories are kind of gross. I mean, amphibians, apes, men’s ribs, neanderthals crawling out of slime…

So where on earth did really attractive people come from? You think models like Gisele Bundchen evolved from a frickin’ chimpanzee?

You raise a very valid point, and timely as well. Runway models clearly evolved separately from regular mortals.

You should go see a very special Fashion Week tableau in Milan, which addresses this dilemma.

Check out the combo shot above. Slender, gorgeous models did once crawl on all fours, but in a graceful way.

Then, with considerable poise, they rose to their knees, discovered sizzling hot stiletto shoes, put them on and walked away, pouting and flouncing.

Hmmm. I don’t know.

Hey, they couldn’t show it in Milan if it wasn’t true.

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Above: Combination photo of a model reacting after she falls during the Mila Schon Spring/Summer 2010 women’s collection show at Milan Fashion Week September 29, 2009. REUTERS/Alessandro Garofalo

Below: Brazilian model Gisele Bundchen in Berlin in a 2008 file photo. REUTERS/Johannes Eisele

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30 comments

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Could I get a closer shot of the shoes please? (batting eyelids)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

So you think those supermodels are hot? Then why is it that a frickin’ male chimpanzee seems to have different preferences? Haven’t you heard that beauty is in the frickin’ eye of the beholder? Well, actually it’s not. It’s in the frickin’ evolved brain of the beholder. And if your frickin’ ancestors hadn’t been sexually attracted to females of their population ever since sex was invented, you wouldn’t be here to share your deep frickin’ thoughts with all of us.

BTW, it doesn’t matter if a frickin’ theory is gross, it only matters if it is true. Since evolution is supported by a great deal of evidence, it is a good bet that it actually is true.

Posted by Edger Alien Poe | Report as abusive

Once again, showing why the world is too stupid. Want to know how people evolved? Open up a book! For goodness sake, do a simple google search. Paintings from the 15th century tend to show evolution of people in the 15th century in them. Oh my, what a concept.

And the high heels? I wish those would come back in fashion for men. Originally both sexes wore them. How do I know? Bella told me. Try reading a book some time. It might help. Of course putting down the beer bottle might work as well. Save a brain cell, put down the alcohol.

And don’t call me Shirley. Or Francis.

Posted by Darwin Fish | Report as abusive

Dammit Darwin, stop taking up comments space. I’m expecting to hear from Catherine Zeta-Jones any minute now.

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

Hey Shra, is there something wrong with your eye? You’ve got a tic or something.

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

I’m mad at you. I turned 40 and Michael turned 65 on the 25th. No card, nothing….

Posted by Catherine Zeta-Jones | Report as abusive

Yeah, I know, your gift was returned in the mail. Turns out I sent it to John Paul-Jones, the American naval hero, by mistake.

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

Common mistake. He’s a half-cousin. Not sure which side though….

Posted by Catherine Zeta-Jones | Report as abusive

“Darwinism/creationism”

There is no debate. Every educated person knows evolution is a basic scientific fact, and magical creation is childish nonsense.

Posted by bobxxxx | Report as abusive

I find that chimpanzees are considerably brighter than anyone who is disgusted by the fact that you and I and Gisele Bundchen are closely related to chimpanzees. The creotards’ claims of human exceptionalism have been proven to be bunk, and I don’t know why anyone feels demeaned to be considered another animal. Organisms rock. I, for one, am proud to be related to every organism in the world.

Posted by Katharine | Report as abusive

@ bobxxxx – Unfortunately, what you say is untrue. Check this out: In Six Days: Why Fifty Scientists Choose to Believe in Creation
Edited By: John Ashton
By: Edited by John F. Ashton, Ph.D.

“What do geneticist James Allan, geophysicist John Baumgardner, and electrical engineer Stephen Taylor have in common? They’re all respected scientists with Ph.D.s who believe in a literal 6-day creation. Drawing on current scientific research and solid scriptural evidence, 50 professional scientists witness to the truth of the Genesis account.”

Unbelievable, but true.

Posted by Dewesq55 | Report as abusive

Huhn….after reading some of these comments, I’m guessing a sense of humor went the way of those fish with the leggy thingys that walked on land……

Posted by stranger | Report as abusive

I think you’re right, stranger. It scares the poop out of me that some readers think I seriously believe fashion models evolved differently from everybody else, when of course I’m aware they are really made of plastic in chemistry labs.

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

I love it when people take it seriously. It allows me some vindication in my thought that perhaps I am not as stupid as the rest of the world.

I thought that models were just Barbie dolls that some mad scientist had brought to life in some underground cave lab somewhere.

Posted by Little Miss Random | Report as abusive

@ Edger Alien Poe, Darwin Fish and bobxxxx: Try this on for starters: the cosmic wavelength ratio is close to 1/1000000 what random chance would put it at. This is not a multiple-choice freak natural selection thing. the universe, however you believe it was made, was only made once. one chance to get this ratio to within 1/1000000 of the one required for life. This is not an accident. Another thing: the intro to Darwin’s book was written by someone who did not believe in Darwinism. And if that’s not enough, check out The Evolution Handbook. It has 1000 pages of support for my position. All your position has to say for itself is 1000 freak accidents? I’d say that’s unscientific. And bobxxxx – I’m educated.

-The Critic- <

Posted by TheCritic | Report as abusive

Bob, how long has it been that some one batted eyelids at you??

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

WOW! I’m so glad you guys all think the whole earth and universe just happened to come into existence when two giant things ran into each other in space. I’m sure it’s happened, (the two big things running into each other) more than once, but new planets weren’t created each time. I think it’s sad you don’t care enough about yourself to think that a loving creator made this earth for us, and the stars for us to enjoy.

Posted by wowzers | Report as abusive

Blog Guy,

Looks like some folks mistook your site for some kind of educational website – again. You really seem to be in danger of losing your job, it appears to me.

I think you need to come up with some term other than “evolution” to describe the existence of those magnificent creatures known as super-models (as opposed to the lesser, substandard plain model). Perhaps something oxymoronic like real-imitation people?

Posted by Dave | Report as abusive

Imma let you finish, but Beyonce had the best explanation of evolution of all time….

Posted by K. West | Report as abusive

You know, I’d be interested in hearing Beyonce’s theory of evoloution…

Posted by Little Miss Random | Report as abusive

Although, being a ‘devout Christian’ (according to some websites), she’d be into creationism wouldn’t she?

I wonder if she’ll drop by to explain, or if THREE celebrities commenting on one blog would be too much.

Posted by Little Miss Random | Report as abusive

The article contains the question:
” … where on earth did really attractive people come from?

A very accurate history book,
the Bible,
gives us the answer:
i.e. … they are descendants of our first parent:

Genesis 1

27… God created man in his own image,
in the image of God he created him;
male and female he created them.

28 God blessed them and said to them,
“Be fruitful and increase in number … ”

See:
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?sea rch=Genesis1&version=NIV

Posted by Joseph | Report as abusive

Correction:
the last word
in the 5th line should be plural (parents)
“i.e.
… they are descendants of our first parents:”

Posted by Joseph | Report as abusive

Question for Joseph

God made Adam & Eve, they were the only people on earth. They had two boys, Cain & Abel. Who was the mother of Cain & Abel’s children?

Posted by some agnostic guy | Report as abusive

People, I would gracefully invite you all to take this discussion where it belongs, away from a humour blog, please… some of us are distracted by the seriousness of the discussion!

Posted by M | Report as abusive

Second that, M!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Hey, let’s not be hasty here. If I could get comments from everybody who has an opinion on evolution, my pageviews would at least double…

Posted by Robert Basler | Report as abusive

“some agnostic guy”
asked:
“Question for Joseph…”Who was the mother of Cain & Abel’s children?”

A.
“… Adam lived 800 years and had other sons and daughters” (Genesis 5:4)

Cain & Abel would have found a wife among their sisters.

It was not until much later, in the days of Moses,
when God prohibited sexual relations with close relatives:
e.g.
Leviticus 18
(partial quote)
6 ” ‘No one is to approach any close relative to have sexual relations. I am the LORD.
. . .
9 ” ‘Do not have sexual relations with your sister,
. . .
11 ” ‘Do not have sexual relations with the daughter of your father’s wife,
born to your father; she is your sister.

References:

Genesis 5 From Adam to Noah
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?sea rch=Genesis5&version=NIV

Leviticus 18 Unlawful Sexual Relations
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?sea rch=Leviticus18&version=NIV

Cain’s Wife—Who Was She?
http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles  /nab/who-was-cains-wife

Posted by Joseph | Report as abusive

ha, you’ve done it again

you take a picture of someone falling on the runway and somehow make it related to Darwin’s theory

Posted by Name | Report as abusive

[...] evolution, humor, science Reuters: I have a question about the whole Darwinism/creationism debate, and I know you are educated in [...]

Hey agnostic guy – you wrote “God made Adam & Eve, they were the only people on earth. They had two boys, Cain & Abel. Who was the mother of Cain & Abel’s children?”

Obviously Eve got banged by all 3 of her men. Thus the Bible proves that incest is a good thing, & also proves that Oedipus was right about his Mother after all.

Posted by Bobo_9 | Report as abusive