Some mushy peas in my handbag, please!

December 23, 2009

queen combo 490

Okay staff, you’re aware of our public relations challenge.

We want to soften Queen Elizabeth’s image as a mega-rich monarch with lots of castles and jewels, and make her appear to be more like, you know, your average grandma.

BRITAIN/We’re kicking it off today by having her take a normal train ride someplace, just like anybody else would do.

The queen will get on, sit with the little people, maybe drink some tea from a Styrofoam cup and have a baked bean sandwich or some Marmite or bangers and mushy peas. Lonnie, she knows to act like she enjoys that crap, right? Don’t forget her clean plastic fork.

And the photographers get to record it all. They’ll eat it up.

Lonnie, is everything all set? You’ve planned every detail? The photos have GOT to look like she’s just simple folk, or heads will roll.

Remember, there can be NOTHING to indicate she’s special. Our careers depend on this, Lonnie!

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Britain’s Queen Elizabeth boards a scheduled train at the Kings Cross station in London to go to Kings Lynn in Norfolk, December 17, 2009.  REUTERS/Stefan Rousseau/Pool

Britain’s Queen Elizabeth waits for a scheduled train to depart. REUTERS/Stefan Rousseau/Pool

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4 comments

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Aww, bless her dear heart… doesnt she look so grandma-ly with the Hermes headscarf and that absolutely beautiful bunch of Harrod’s fresh daisies… awww…. bless her! (wiping a tear of my eye, in mock English fashion)…

Btw, like Grandma Queenie’s shoes..

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

So, you mean all the undercover MI5 agents cannot be seen in the pictures? Are you sure that is not a body double in the first two pictures?

Posted by 1M1 | Report as abusive

Please, mind the gap between the platform and the train. Please, mind the gap … your majesty.

Posted by LMR | Report as abusive

LOL, LMR! I so completely remember hearing that pompus booming voice announcing..”Mind the Gap” when I was travelling in London… I even had a souvenir “mug” for that.. tourist that I was…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive