Gym zombies on the prowl! Is YOUR brain safe?

January 12, 2010

Blog Guy, I suspect that the trainer at my health club is a zombie. Is that possible?

Yeah, the pervasive presence of so-called gym zombies is becoming a real problem.

zombie wrestling 490

So, how can I tell for sure?

zombie wrestling crop 260Ask yourself if he has you doing lots of exercises that would seem to soften your skull and tenderize your brain. That could be a bad sign.

Oh my God! We do nothing but what he calls “brainercises!”

Also, he’s changed my starting time to midnight, and I’m supposed to use a black Magic Marker to draw a perforated line around my head at ear-level!

Calm down. That sounds pretty harmless to me. Don’t say anything that could mar this poor man’s reputation until you have more to go on.

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Wrestlers train at the gymnasium of one of the most prestigious wrestling clubs in New Delhi, January 12, 2010. REUTERS/Reinhard Krause

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I have seen too many of these…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Me too…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

It looks like a bad prison porno. “So many arses…which one do I choose first?”

Hey Shra, was your b-day shoe shopping successful?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

I am afraid some of the managers in my organisation have been overdoing it with some of these exercises to soften the skull and tenderise the brain…

I think you are right, Robert, the pervasiveness of these trainers is really troublesome… the problem is they only ever do the tenderising and very little of the actual eating!!! That would save us some trouble in this place, I say!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

I am having trouble understanding “pervasiveness”…it is too big a word for my med filled brain to process…
now I know i am not supposed to learn anything…. but of course no one said anything any understanding anything!!

Mr.Pilot… I didnt go shoe shopping… :( but I think I will check out at the post offices first to see if I get Unca’s gift… though he has sent it to a different country…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

It’s a little scary, I think I have been in a class like that. So much spandex… (shudders).
Happy Birthday, Shra (belated). Hope you found the shoes of your dreams.

Posted by Kaos | Report as abusive

Where Shra do you reside?

uncarastus, I do not know if you have experience in the field of avaition, so I apologize if you already know this; pilots refer to the underside of an aircraft as the “dirty” side because it is not very aerodynamic with the gear and flaps down. That being the case there is a little humorous saying between pilots that we like to land with the “dirty side down.” These Canadian helicopter trainees have it all wrong. Their dirty sides are facing the wrong way.

See that, I mixed in a butt joke with something a bit educational.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Zombie wrestling = genius.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

men at the gyms just go there to look at the mirror… i know, i saw it.

Posted by Caglar | Report as abusive

I take the same position like these guys some nights when I cant sleep.. it gets too boring, I try to find different sleeping positions so I can sleep maybe.. sometimes it does help, and now I know why, I soften my skull and tenderize my brain… I seeee

Posted by Caglar | Report as abusive

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Posted by Gym zombies on the prowl! Is YOUR brain safe? | Analysis & Opinion … Search | Report as abusive

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…. Tim, you really are becoming a guru!!! :)
Thanks Kaos… I hope so too….
Mr. Pilot, you would still be zapped…and currently I am residing in a city which is reallly haunted..That should explain my meds.. and also coz I visit BG’s blog :)..
which is actually quite therapeutic… There you go… my big word for the day…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

The guy in the corner… is he a zombie in training?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Shra, please remember I’m not legally allowed to make those therapeutic claims for my blog. It seems to work on some people, but it has also pushed several right over the edge…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

You can make educational claims, but not therapeutic ones?????? Funny, how one works and the other sooooooo does not!!!
Kaos, there is one tenderised-brain guy in the corner not wearing spandex… is that you???

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I would be….zapped?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Shra, I am with you on this one. While my education in this blog comes mostly from other commenters, and not Robert himself, the therapeutic benefit of coming here everyday is just mahhhvelous! Ahhh!! It almost reduced my daily dosage needs!

Tim, whenever you are levitating, could I suggest you bring Mr. Pilot along, just to be on the safe side? We wouldn’t want you not being able to land safely again now, would we?

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Mmmm. Lycra. Especially … is that hot pink lycra?

What kind of self respecting wrestler wears hot pink lycra?

Posted by LMR | Report as abusive

Well, Tim, I can trade you for my tiger-stripey lycra from the 80s. Or You can also have my zebra-stripey one, if you prefer. Shocking pink will go well with my glowing green lycra shirt. What do you say, trade?

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

I seriously hope you are kidding…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

What makes you say that, Shra? You love shoes, I love lycra… what’s the problem?

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Oh no M, I dont have any problems (oopsie)… I was just… ummm… wondering… umm… about the colour… of… (looking here and there)… your workout clothes?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Oh, Shra, you needn’t worry about that!! Given I don’t do any workout at all (the facilities in this funny farm are rather inadequate for that) all I have are leftovers from the 80s, back when I wanted to be in a famous glam rock hair-band… unluckily, I only ever got the outfit and not much else!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Sorry, Tim, can you say that again? can’t hear you with all this rattling!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive