Am I my brothel’s keeper?

January 21, 2010

Now I’ve had enough. This deputy mayor in Amsterdam has proposed some new rules for brothels, which I guess are legal over there.

NETHERLANDSAmong other things, he says prostitution should be banned between 4 a.m. and 8 a.m. because, and I quote, “Only the biggest creeps and boozers are walking around at those hours.”

The deputy mayor’s name is Lodewijk Asscher, which I’m not even going to make fun of because it’s too easy.

But here’s the thing, Mr. Asscher, if indeed that is your real name.

DUTCH-PROSTITUTES/What’s magical about a 4 a.m. cut-off? Who the hell do you think is going to a brothel at say, 2 a.m. to pay strangers for sex? Atticus Finch?

And personally, I’m out atΒ  7 a.m. every single day, walking around, and I don’t see “creeps and boozers.” Of course, I’m not usually looking for a brothel then, and maybe Mr. AsscherΒ  is only familiar with people who are.

Lastly, it’s entirely possible that some dudes go to a brothel at 7 a.m. because they enjoy messing around in a tawdry setting while watching early morning TV infomercials about cheap gadgets that make lunch meat. Would you call THEM creeps?

I trust I’ve made my point.

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Right: A prostitute poses in the a doorway on the Achterdam, one of the oldest streets in Alkmaar, a town north of Amsterdam, in a 2001 file photo. REUTERS/Paul Vreeker

Left: Banana Bar dancers pose with a visitor during the open day of Amsterdam’s red light district in a 2007 file photo. Organizers staged the open day to counter bad publicity surrounding the 800-year-old district after harrowing reports of forced prostitution, human trafficking and organized crime. REUTERS/Toussaint Kluiters

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LMR, an almost, almost bare boob shot for you there…
Pandering to the boys I see…..

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Honestly, I think it would make more sense for brothels to have the same hours as Taco Bell…or maybe more like Outback Steakhouse. If it violates some code of morality for me to get a steak before 5 p.m….then you can’t romp with any floozies before then either!

Posted by justK | Report as abusive

By the way…what is the point of the butt cape homegirl in the top is wearing? Am I that out of the loop when it comes to lingerie?

Posted by justK | Report as abusive

K, a little romp after lunch is probably not a bad thing to help digest the rump!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Robert: Yes, I would call those guys creeps. I mean, those are the scariest of creeps to me, at least.

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

justK, maybe her butt is a superhero? Or maybe she’s covering up some cellulite? Maybe her butt is cold?

Ahhh the possibilities are endless!!



Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

K, she is auditioning for the X-rated version of Supergirl!

Hence the red cape. The blue spandex, of course, has been substituted by some spank-ex, which probably will produce a lot of blue and black.

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

How come no one is commenting on the almost visible boob there???

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

OK, I’ll bite. I almost see a boob there, Mr Blog Guy…

Posted by BmwRider | Report as abusive

I was heading towards the boobs but then K brought up the butt-cape so that re-directed my attention. I might be the minority here but I think it kinda looks sexy. I am not a fan or red in lingerie really but she wears it well.

As far as oddities go in her outfit, what’s with the sunglasses?

It’s good to see Mr. B. is an equal opportunity panderer.

Now I am in the mood for a volcano burrito.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

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Posted by Amsterdam Adult Entertainment: Am I my brothel’s keeper? | The Low Down On Amsterdam Escorts. | Report as abusive

mew mew.. woof woof..

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Um, Mr Basler ? How do you know what infomercials are on in a brothel at 7am ?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Uh, well, I watch those early morning lunch meat infomercials at home, but I notice the presenter often says, “We’d like to give a special hello to all our friends at the Amsterdam brothels!”

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

RB…you expect us to believe that?

Yeah…I gotta bridge in Ireland I wanna sell ya.




Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

Blog Guy! I told you that picture was for your eyes only and NOT to be shared on the blog!

Posted by LMR | Report as abusive

Are you saying that’s you in the almost visible boob shot, LMR??? πŸ˜‰

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

E, I’ve got a tower in Paris ready for decommissioning, if you want to buy the scrap steel. With the price of steel these days it might be a good idea! πŸ˜‰

Hey, it’s already been sold twice, so I might as well give it a try!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

That “almost visible boob” is scary looking.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Hmmmm LMR sending saucy photos of herself to Blog Guy? This is a soap opera in the making!

When is the next instalment?



Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

Oh wow…I’m actually posting on a weekend!

But I saw this joke in a magazine and had to share.


Q: What do you call the person who runs a brothel?

A: The Bonk Manager….



Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

Well, it all started when BG emailed me after my first disappearance. He cares deeply about all 10 of his readers (although I think there’s probably more now), and so wanted to ensure that his popularity didn’t drop.

He has emailed me several times since then, attempting to cover his trail after each disappearance, as we know that the only time I disappear is when BG has some new drugs that he wants to try on one of us.

So I have his email address. In a drug induced fog I thought he was the Mayor of Mt Isa and sent him the first photo of myself in the first photo on the street in Mt Isa, hoping that he would use it in the next Mt Isa tourism campaign with the slogan ‘Come to Mt Isa – not all the women are aesthetically challenged’.

When I realised my mistake I told Bob he could keep the photo for his private collection, as long as he didn’t publish it. Then I disappeared again … and that’s all I can remember.

Posted by LMR | Report as abusive

Hmmm… Bob, could we have some of the new drugs please…. I soo desperately need to disappear and find myself a cute Mr.Fab Abs… πŸ˜›

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive