Tanks for the memories?

March 2, 2010

A Reuters story from Moscow says about 100 modern Russian tanks have been discovered abandoned on the side of a road in the Ural mountains. There are video clips showing the tanks parked in long rows.

tanks 1 490

I’m  not totally clear on how this happens. These T-80 tanks hold three-person crews, which means what? At some point several hundred soldiers walked into town for a drink or whatever, and then forgot where they parked?

RUSSIA/“Yo Lonnie! Man, am I hung over! How much vodka did we drink last night, comrade?”

“Jeez, Roy, I don’t even remember how we got here. Hey, what do you suppose this big honking ignition key in my pocket goes to?”

“Beats me, Lonnie. Look, there must be a bus station around here, let’s see if they’ve got 300 extra seats for us and the other guys.”

“Okay, Roy. Then we should probably figure out what we’re doin’ in these uniforms.”

“Good idea. But hey, you wanna stop off for quick drink first?”

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Top: Russian T-80 tanks pass nerby a Poklonnaya Gora war memorial in Moscow in a 1995 file photo.REUTERS/Viktor Korotayev

Bottom: A serviceman holds a desk by his teeth at a military show during the celebration of Defender of the Fatherland Day in Russia’s far eastern city of Vladivostok, February 23, 2010. REUTERS/Yuri Maltsev

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35 comments

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hehe left tanks at road side??

LOL nothing tops it I guess so this is story of the year for me ! :D

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Spencer Tunick has moved on from naked people to military hardware – this is his new installation called ‘tanks, but no tanks’.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Ah, surely that’s happened to us all. You have a few more than you planned, decide it’s best not to drink and drive, walk/taxi home, wake up next morning and can’t remember where you left your car.

Posted by knit_nurse | Report as abusive

I never really got over the fact that they call their country the Fatherland… do, we have any russians amongst us to explain that please? Mean that in the best possible way!
As for the tanks left on the road side… say, can we convert them into something drivable? Say, like a Mini Cooper… they are like, climbing my list of favourite cars… :)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Are the Russians deploying the latest in ceral box armor plating for their tanks?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Ooh I like tanks!! Reminds me of when I was a kid, sending my Transformers to war against my My Little Ponies. The heavy machinery always won.

:D

E.

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

And I meant cereal. One of these days Hooked On Phonics will actually work for me.

Really E? Even with the My Little Ponies magical powers of… whatever it is a My Little Pony does?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

My Little Ponies had nothing on Optimus Prime. *sigh* I’m still kinda in love with him.

<3

E.

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

Optimus Prime is pretty bad ass. That would be interesting relations though E. Hopefully he, with his how many tons of rugged machined power, has a very delicate touch. :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Nooo, Shra, you’d like tanks, they’re fun to drive. Big fun.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

No need to worry about parking either, although the fuel consumption is a bit of a bine.

Posted by knit_nurse | Report as abusive

I would gladly sacrifice the fuel consumption to have a nice big cannon to blow up any cars that annoy me! :)

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

As we say hereabouts, “Be the only person in town to own a T-80 tank and, before you know it, be the only person in town.”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

ifly, delicate touch? Not my thing! This IS a ‘crush’ we’re talking about.

:P

E.

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive

Boys and their toys!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ha ha E..good one!

I dunno about being the only person in town Dr. D. Maybe the only person in town who doesn’t get stuck in traffic.

And yes Shra, things that go boom are good. :)

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

The Russians really should have seen this coming, tanks parking themselves exhausted by the roadside. I mean, shouldn’t hoards of tanks mucking about Moscow in 1995 have been a red flag?

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Optimus Prime…. well, definitely looked at him as a hero… however, not really a crush…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Yeah yeah… dont I know that…. action movies with no storylines…. ahh!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

A plot in an action movie would just muck it all up. All an action movie needs is explosions, car chases, gun battles and the occasional boobie shot.

And Keanu Reeves showing up every now and then to say “whoah”.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

he he he he he! I think we could watch Speed, Mr.Pilot… we both seem to like Keanu.. :)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Guess nobody remembers the tank-made reefs off the coast of Texas.

Posted by D.D.R | Report as abusive

Bill and Teds Excellent Adventure! Whoah! :p

D.D.R…is that to say then the Russians are making tank-made mountains?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

i hope they set the kick stands on all of the tanks they ahve a nasty habit of falling over!

Posted by ochoo | Report as abusive

Ah, tanks… just what I needed to deal with a little mosquito problem I’m having these days!!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Say M, how little is the mosquito problem?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Oh, I guess one or two of these T-80s will do… nothing major, really.

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

I mean, if you’re interested, you can keep the remaining 298..

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

I dont have a mosquito problem, so, no thanks…
But am wondering if one or two can be used to make a Mini… think that would work?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I got dips on two. I like having a back up tank…just in case.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Yes Unca, I know. I was so excited about the prospect of getting a couple of tanks that I failed to edit myself. After realizing my mistake I felt it best to just let my shame stand and use it as motivation in future endeavors.

That being said, wen can I pick up my tanks?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

What are you boys ranting about?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Sixty wing mirrors on one tank and they still have to stick someone’s head out the top to see where they are going….

Posted by knit_nurse | Report as abusive

Awww dammit you never let me get to play with all the cool toys!!

And no, looking down the barrel of a sniper rifle to check for bullets does not count.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

How old do you have to be to require storage for your used?

Posted by knit_nurse | Report as abusive