Oddly Enough Blog

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Mom and Dad, the Beautiful People?

March 11, 2010

parents combo 490

I should warn you, I’m kind of emotional today. See, I’m adopted, and I just got a report from a private detective who has tracked down my biological parents after all these years. You can imagine my feelings as I read it.

Hmmm. It says BOTH of my parents were models, which might explain my interest in fashion.

parents dad 240Mom was a runway model for designer Eugene “Toilethead” Johnson, and she “looked graceful in all kinds of plumbing supplies,” whatever that means.

Dad, it seems, “had a stylish flair, exuding a charm that had women swarming around him like roaches on a dead rat.” Wow, this detective has a way with words.

Oh no! Tragically, a month after I was born, Dad was caught smuggling a stolen sapphire bracelet through customs, in his mouth. What was he thinking?

He went to prison, and Mom, broken-hearted, gave me away. She went off to work in Eugene’s metal shop, making uncomfortable but trendy aluminum and copper clothing.

Now for the really tough part. The detective has included a photo of each of them. Trembling, I open the envelope to confront my gene pool for the first time. Well, at least they’ll be glamorous.

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Top left: A model presents a creation from the Katy Eary for MAN 2010 Autumn/Winter collection during London Fashion Week, February 24, 2010. REUTERS/Suzanne Plunkett

Top right: A model presents a creation by French designer Jean-Paul Gaultier as part of his Haute Couture Spring Summer 2010 fashion show in Paris, January 27, 2010. REUTERS/Benoit Tessier

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Comments

Yup… I knew she had a toilet seat around her face even before I read the blog….
Make she was dunked…. and used that experience to get where she got? Weirder things have happened…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Yo yo Green Acres in da hood!!! Represent gangsta on da farm keepin it reeeeaaaalllll!!

Check it, grill be blingin!!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Happy birthday, Pilot… Big plans?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Certainly not a pool I’d want to swim in.

Happy birthday ifly! Enjoy your day, eat ice cream for breakfast and treat yourself right!

:D

E.

PS> I’m adopted too. Honest! I am!

Posted by egeria | Report as abusive
 

Aww thanks guys for the birthday wishes. :)

I am treating myself to a paycheck today by working. No big plans today but this weekend is gonna be a party like it’s 1999!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Where’s the party this weekend?? Hey, hold on! I am gonna have a ball too… cant wait to get away from work! This job is eating me alive!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now, dont you dare ask how!

Happy B’day Mr.Pilot (once again)!MWAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

LOL I liked the girl, looks like she likes it rough ;-)

@Ifly: Many happy returns of the day, party wild :)

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive
 

Lol thank you 69Spinster… I think a bachelor party would be more appropriate to wake up looking like that. And not remember why. :p

Thanks fwd079 and Shra! :)

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Happy Birthday Mr Pilot.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

And now we know where you get your inclincation to potty humor, Bob. You take after your mom – how sweet!

Posted by BethyB | Report as abusive
 

@ifly … go fly! That’s my perfect birthday wish to you! Treat yourself to a helicopter. :-)

Party like a rock star!

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive
 

Yeah Beth, amazing, huh, that something like that can be inherited….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Thanks CrowGirl!

Thank you CAM.. I treated myself to a picture of a helicopter and drooled for a bit with desire. :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

PIlotGuy, happy belated birthday. I hope you had a ball!

Robert, I think it’s advisable for you to seek out better psychological advise: “Well, at least they’ll be glamorous.” Not!

Posted by justM | Report as abusive
 

Thanks M, missed ya for drinks!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Happy belated birthday, Ifly. And many more!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive
 

Thanks Dr. D.!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

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