The mother of all wardrobe malfunctions?
Class, welcome to Wardrobe Malfunctions 101, where we’ll see what can go wrong if you try to cut corners in the high end fashion design process.
We’re going through this stuff quickly, so please take notes and pay attention.
Lamar, are you aware that we ordered 50,000 of these dresses, and the red straps are two inches too short to attach to the fabric? So the chick has to hang on to the strap all evening, or else walk bent over like the Hunchback of Notre Dame. No honey, don’t shake hands!
And this middle one, with the black eye patch, the walker and the underpants. Sure it’s attractive on her, but have you thought about your demographic?
I mean, you show me a customer who needs an eyepatch and a walker, and I’ll show you somebody I don’t want to see her underpants!
Okay, Paris Hilton’s gown. Did anybody run this one past legal? Four words: “I Dream of Jeannie.”
Cripes, who signed off on this raincoat on the right? Have you ever heard of LINING a garment? Now we have to include a white bar like this with every one we sell!
And who designed this simple men’s white tunic? Nice lines, but it’s a PULLOVER, which means using sharpened metal collar stays was NOT a great plan. That’s gonna hurt coming off, too.
What else we got here? Did anybody TEST that new super-elastic space age fabric before we used it for evening gowns? They started trying to undress that model yesterday, and they’re still pulling!
Oh and finally… Please. Dozens of July 4th sparklers sticking out of her ears?
That may have been edgy I suppose, but having the burning part facing INWARD? Really? What time does the show start?
Model presents a creation by Ukrainian designer Oksana Karavanska during Ukrainian Fashion Week in Kiev March 11, 2010.REUTERS/Konstantin Chernichkin
Model displays a creation by Spanish designer Andres Sarda during the Cibeles Madrid Fashion Week Fall/Winter 2010 show in Madrid February 22, 2010. REUTERS/Sergio Perez
Socialite Paris Hilton attends a news conference in Dubai, June 17, 2009. REUTERS/Mosab Omar
Model presents a creation by fashion designer Alexandra Moura as part of her Autumn/Winter 2010/11 women’s fashion collection during Lisbon Fashion Week, March 11, 2010. REUTERS/Jose Manuel Ribeiro
Model presents a creation as part of the Dsquared2 Fall/Winter 2010/11 Men’s collection during Milan Fashion Week, January 19, 2010. REUTERS/Alessandro Garofalo
The hand of French designer Adeline Andre holds a length of fabric as she removes a dress from a model during her Haute-Couture Spring Summer 2010 fashion show in Paris, January 25, 2010. REUTERS/Charles Platiau
Model presents a creation by Indian designer Manish Arora as part of his Fall/Winter 2010/11 women’s collection show during Paris Fashion Week on March 4, 2010. REUTERS/Pascal Rossignol