Monkey cops, when it’s a jungle out there!

April 1, 2010

THAILAND-SOUTH/

Okay boys, prepare yourselves for the new smash hit series of  the fall TV season. This is the kind of high concept creativity that made network programming what it is today.

monkey cop vertical 240

It’s about this small town that can’t afford to fund its police force, so a bunch of monkeys come out of the jungle and take over the cop duties. Is that brilliant, or what?

We’re calling it “Monkey See, Monkey Blue.”

Imagine the possibilities! Milk come out of my nose when I think of monkey cops driving patrol cars, shooting at bad guys, eating doughnuts all the time….

In the teaser a monkey cop handcuffs a robber, see, and then he takes out his Miranda card, we zoom in on his face, and he just grins and says, “Ooh ooh ooh eee eee eee aah aah aah…” Then BAM! Opening credits!

Of course the police commissioner is a human – we’re looking at Abe Vigoda – and the monkeys just drive him nuts, and he has to keep a big bunch of bananas on his desk, see, and…

What, Lamar? Yes, we did think of calling the series “Monk,” but Legal said there’s some sort of problem with that.

Monkey cop slideshow

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Santisuk, a five-year-old pig-tailed macaque monkey, wears a police shirt as he rides atop a patrolling vehicle in Saiburi district in Yala province in southern Thailand April 1, 2010. The monkey, who was found injured and adopted by local policemen, goes dressed in uniform on patrol every day to help improve the force’s image and relations with the population. REUTERS photos, Damir Sagolj

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22 comments

We welcome comments that advance the story through relevant opinion, anecdotes, links and data. If you see a comment that you believe is irrelevant or inappropriate, you can flag it to our editors by using the report abuse links. Views expressed in the comments do not represent those of Reuters. For more information on our comment policy, see http://blogs.reuters.com/fulldisclosure/2010/09/27/toward-a-more-thoughtful-conversation-on-stories/

“Bad boys, bad boys,
“Wutcha gonna do,
“Wutcha gonna do when they fling poo on you?”

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Well, I hope the monkeys have special jackets, otherwise how will anyone tell them apart from the regular police?

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Sadly, I’d probably watch that show. If I had TV.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before they discover he’s up to monkey business and remove him from office.

Posted by BethyB | Report as abusive

Hereabouts, we have successfully employed monkeys. The work-product of the monkeys far exceeds our expectations. Their grasp of the issues far exceeds their “human” predecessors; they are far more reliable; and their morals are clearly superior.

At first, we questioned: Will people vote for monkeys to represent them in government? The answer was a resounding “Yes.” Apparently, people hereabouts would rather vote for a monkey than a donkey or an elephant.

But this has not come without a cost. Our former “human” representatives, it seems, are incapable of doing ANYTHING productive, incapable of making any kind of contribution to society.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

“Officer, is that a banana in your pocket, oh wait, you’re not wearing any pants.”

Posted by Billl | Report as abusive

monkey improving image with Thai population? Who exactly lives in Thailand then?? ;-)

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Ok I give up trying to comment on this post.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Bill – genius ! :)

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Thanks you CrowGirl.

Posted by Billl | Report as abusive

Or simply, thanks.

Posted by Billl | Report as abusive

do they really take a bite out of crime ?

Posted by otiswhat | Report as abusive

[...] Okay ragazzi, preparatevi per la nuova serie di grande successo della stagione tv caduta. Questo è il tipo di creatività alto concetto che ha reso la programmazione di rete quello che è oggi. . . URL articolo originale http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/20 10/04/01/monkey-cops-when-its-a-jungle-o ut-there/ [...]

I am sure I posted a comment on this blog…. where is it???? Monkey got your banana BG?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I am gonna try this ONE more time..

“Bad boys bad boys,
“Wutcha gonna do.
“Wutcha gonna do when they fling poo on you?”

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Duck?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I guess they don’t have an Edinburgh version of “Cops” over there do they Shra? :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Nah…. havent seen any good looking cops either… They are so…. not humorous…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ah Shra I gotcha. Well let me lend a little insight for ya. Here in the States there is a show called “Cops”. It’s one of those “reality” programs that follows various law enforment officers on their patrol assigments chasing down rednecks and all sorts of urban trash (of all races mind you, white-trash included, so no racism going on.) The theme song to the show is the one that goes

“Bad boys bad boys,
“Wutcha gonna do,
“Wutcha gonna do when they come for you?”

So I, being the clever, witty, and unquestionably hilarious person that I am, subsituted the line “Wutch gonna do when they come for you?” with “Wutch gonna do when they fling poo on you?” because of the police being monkeys. And monkeys fling poo. So monkey police would fling poo on the bad guys.

That little gem of humor took me FOUR attempts to get posted before Mr. B. finally allowed it.

I know that my humor is so vast that it is often on higher levels than most people understand but I gotta keep doin what I do so the world can be a better place!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Ahh, now that you mention it… we do get that show up here in Scotland! (What did you think I am a remote desolate part of the world like Dave!… Sorry Dave… just making a point)….
And Humour is a tricky emotion to digest…. some get it , some fling poo… :P

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I am probably better off just flinging poo :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Umm…. dont think that would be a job profile tho… hmmm…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

That depends, if I were a politician or a very bad journalist then that’s pretty much exactly what my job profile would be.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

[...] Okay, you know why we’re here. We owe the network one more high-concept police procedural to match our earlier hits, “Police Pope” and “Monkey See, Monkey Blue.” [...]