News, but not the serious kind
The penalty for tampering with a smoke detector is…
These are scary times to be flying, what with nutjobs and clouds of ash and stuff. Passengers understandably are attuned to the slightest indication that there may be something amiss.
Which is why you probably don’t want to be settling in shortly after take-off and see the pope walk into your cabin. I mean, that can’t be a good sign, can it?
“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for flying Alitalia today. My name is Benedict, and my cardinals and I will do our best to make this a great flight for you.
“All of our movies today will be in Latin, on all channels. Please note your in-flight magazine says we’re showing ‘The Da Vinci Code,’ but that won’t be available due to technical difficulties.
We will start your entertainment momentarily. We will be coming around with beer, wine, cocktails and little bowls of salty nuts.
“An icy cold glass of pinot grigio is going to taste pretty nice, huh? But first, a three-hour mass… Pretend I’m standing on a little balcony…”
Pope Benedict answers reporters’ questions during a news conference aboard his flight to Malta, April 17, 2010. REUTERS/Alessandro Bianchi