Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
We got a regatta!
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Blog Guy, I was intrigued to read about your festival at the Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop, with the Prom Queen and stamps. What other activities have you planned for the event?
Well, we’re having a majestic sailing regatta on the Potomac.
So you have a ship?
No. One ship is not a regatta. We have dozens.
Wow! That’s a lotta regatta!
And they’re all carrying those famous clay warriors from China. It’s a terracotta regatta.
Is it in honor of anyone?
Yes, the founding father of Kenya, Jomo Kenyatta. It’s a Kenyatta regatta.
This all sounds VERY expensive. Is somebody sponsoring it?
Yes, an Italian cheese producer. We’re calling it…
No, Blog Guy! I beg you!
Too late. The Ricotta Regatta.
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Top: People visit the Spanish registered sailing ship ‘Juan Sebastian Elcano’ at the Callao Naval Base April 29, 2010. Eleven sailing ships from America and Europe participated in the regatta celebrating 200 years of independence in some Latin American countries.
Right: Visitors line up to enter the Argentina registered sailing ship ‘Libertad’ at the Callao Naval Base April 29, 2010.
REUTERS photos by Pilar Olivares
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Hey wait a minute, everything rhymes with …yatta.
My gosh, I just checked and you’re right! What are the chances of that!
As much as it shames my Italian heritage, I am not a big fan of ricotta. Although I am sure I make up for it with my love of fish and meat. The holidays are fun.
Oh and just as a note, pay no attention to the wannabe guidos from “The Jersey Shore”. They are pathetic representations of… well… people in general.
Mr. B., for all the times your blogs have ended with readers saying “No, blog guy! I beg you!” or “Please blog guy don’t!” I can’t help but wonder if you have not had past experience in enhanced interrogation techniques or at the least a singing career.
The chances are, of course, nada.
Is there a vendor where I could buy a … frittata?
We can all drive to the Regatta in my Hyundai Sonata.
Mr. B., for all the times your blogs have ended with readers saying “No, blog guy! I beg you!” or “Please blog guy don’t!” I can’t help but wonder if you have not had past experience in enhanced interrogation techniques or at the least a singing career…
You’re very perceptive, Pilot, but I’m afraid I am legally bound not to discuss either of those.
Have you thought about a new career? You gotta …
Now you sound just like my editor. Gotta regatta indeed….
Hey, thanks to my blog post, the event is now going to be covered by Liz Trotta!
I noticed that there were events at two different times – both sponsored by the International House of Pancakes. So does your patter relate to the latter batter regatta, or does that not matter?
Zeitgeist, thanks for the unintended hint as to where you live. If batter and regatta sound similar to you, you must be from Boston. Okay, I’m off to Cuber now….
Will there be musicians? Maybe they’ll play a … toccata!
Yes Bethy, the musicians join the regatta when it gets to Nevada….
Perhaps later the musicians will play a cantata?
But you won’t be able to attend, because after this post, you’re persona non grata.
Yeah Spinster, that’s right. Humor bloggers have pretty much a free pass to go anywhere they want, thanks to whichever Constitutional Amendment it is that protects the right to laugh.
As long as there is a pinata…
The excrutiating rhymes are good, the pretty vessels are fabulous.
And bonus points to anyone who can tell me the difference between a boat and a ship; something I’ve argued about endlessly with water going friends.
CG, there are lots of distinctions between a “boat” and a “ship,” from the way they turn, to the number of decks, to the supposed distinction that a boat can be taken aboard a ship.
The key difference, in my opinion, is that a ship is designed so that it can run from the weather in a heavy sea. Boats are not designed for heavy seas. They become “pooped.” This is not to say that a ship cannot become “pooped.” A ship is pooped when a heavy sea breaks over its stern or quarter. There are various ways to prevent “pooping,” as in the use of a “seagate” with workhorse vessels. Oddly enough, the address of my firm is Four SeaGate.
So, that’s the straight poop on the difference bewtween a ship and a boat, in my opinion.
Doc, I am sure there is a “poop deck” joke in there somewhere… am I right?
I almost don’t dare but it begs asking… why then is a submarine called a boat?
Jeeez!!!! All that talks makes me thirsty for a Pina Colada…
Spanish lips… voo
Doc…I’m lookin’ at yer office building right now.
Are you scared?
E.
So am I E. So am I.
Doc, Ifly; are you perhaps thinking of “Is this the poop deck ?” “Oh no, we’ve got one that’s MUCH worse !”
?
Yes CG, I was waiting for a poop deck reference :p
Is Mr. Scooty your landing craft? That would be awesome!
Ah the pirates life sounds so exciting!