I’d run a million miles, from one of your smiles…
Blog Guy, I haven’t seen you hanging out much for the last few days. Did you take a vacation?
Nah, I’ve been barricaded in my house, ever since I saw a smile that really creeped me out.
A smile? Really? How can you object to a smile? They brighten our world.
Some do, some don’t. Some of them make me wake up with flop sweat in the middle of the night, and give me the heebie-jeebies.
When I see that kind of smile on somebody, then I start to imagine I’m seeing it everywhere. On my plumber, my haberdasher, my dog…
You really like to say haberdasher, don’t you?
Maybe I do. Look, here are some samples of smiles I consider creepy. See if you can figure out which one of them pushed me over the edge. Take your time.
My God, Blog Guy!. There’s not a minute to lose! Put aluminum foil over every inch of the windows! Don’t answer the door for anyone!
Get under the bed! Be careful, he can SMELL fear!
Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein attends a speech by U.S. President Barack Obama about financial regulation at Cooper Union in New York April 22, 2010. REUTERS/Natalie Behring
U.S. Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner smiles in a 2009 file photo. REUTERS/Jonathan Ernst
New Zealand Black Sox perform a ceremonial Haka dance in a 2009 file photo. REUTERS/David Stobbe
Czech Republic’s Tomas Berdych reacts after losing a point during his match in a 2009 file photo. REUTERS/Daniel Munoz
The Big Bad Wolf
A hyena cub in a 2006 file photo. REUTERS/Barry Moody
A fiberglass replica of a Great White shark in a 2007 file photo. REUTERS/Romeo Ranoco
Actor George Clooney arrives for a charity dinner in a 2008 file photo. REUTERS/Max Rossi
U.S. Vice President Dick Cheney in a 2007 file photo. REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque