Oddly Enough Blog
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Are you an optometrist or a pessimist?
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Blog Guy, I am one American who is sick and tired of dehumanizing medical procedures. My own pet peeve is the eye exam.
Really? The EYE exam? That’s what bothers you?
Sure. Read those letter. Ooooh, sorry, you got them all wrong. Either you’re stupid or you need glasses.
Now, I’m going to put this diabolical widget mask on your face and you’ll look like some kind of Steampunk Lone Ranger.
Okay, it’s time for the blinding drops in your eyes and then I push a metal suction cup right up against your eyeball…
I mean, Blog Guy, does it REALLY need to be like that?
No. Just check out these very recent shots from an eye doctor’s office down in Brazil, where everything they do is much more fashionable than anything we do here.
See how they use attractive hats with ribbons to cover an eye during the exam? Note the chic sunglasses and glossy dark lipsticks to test for color blindness. And the eyedrops are made with champagne.
Oh, that’s what I want! Medical Exams of the Rich and Beautiful!
Then head on down there! Tomorrow’s report, The Beautiful People and Bleeding Gum Disease…
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Top combo: models present creations from Fause Haten’s Summer 2010/11 collection during Sao Paulo Fashion Week, June 11, 2010. REUTERS/Nacho Doce
Middle: Models present creations from Alexandre Herchcovitch’s Summer 2010/11 collection during the Sao Paulo Fashion Week, June 10, 2010. REUTERS/Mario Miranda
Bottom: A model presents a creation from Fause Haten’s Summer 2010/11 collection, June 11, 2010, REUTERS/Nacho Doce
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Would the correct term of address be Optomemiss?
Optomemiss, oh Optomemiss? Could I get a second cup of coffee, please?
Why? Oh, why, didn’t I become an optometrist?
O
WHA
TANA
SIAM
Doc: Please read aloud the letters from this chart.
Patient:
O
WHA
TANA
SIAM
Doc: What does it say?
Patient: O. What. Ana. Siam?
Doc: Okay, read it faster.
Patient: O what an ass I am.
Doc: Okay! Good enough. Now, read this chart, slowly at first….
Bet they’d color next to your stickers, Doc. Just have them color before the exam.
I am thinking of getting one of those Guess My Identity/I Only Had Enough Makeup for One Eye/Bad Hair Day hats. Do you think they ticked off their stylist and he put all their hats on them backwards?
If I had hideous makeup on me like that, I would wear my hat like, but with even more coverage!
Where are you Sarabelle?
“Read the last line for me… J-O-I-N-T-H-E-O-D-D-L-Y-E-N-O-U-G-H-B-L- O-G-N-E-T-W-O-R-K.”
Is it true that if a doctor needs to stick a needle in your eye you won’t feel it because you can’t feel anything in your eye? But then you still need to watch a needle about to be stuck right into your eye.
That creeps me the hell out.
Zombies never fail to disappoint RB when he has nothing else to write on
Nope…
Reminds me of Boy George, a little Devo with the shades. Definitely psychedelic. Thanks for the flashback, BG! What in the heck did you put in my doughnut?
I had eye surgery…it was weird. Couldn’t feel a thing but could see it all happening. Weirdest bit was when he was smoothing down the flap after he’d cut it and lasered. Worst bit was smelling something burning!
And have I ever mentioned that I <3 Steampunk?!
E.
Ask what he put in our coffees, Cam….
You won’t feel it once it’s in the middle of your eye but you’d sure as hell feel it going in if they didn’t give you lignocaine drops. Never poked yourself in the eye, ifly?
Oh I have KN… but it was more of an accidental thing that I wasn’t watching my finger coming towards my eye thinking “Imma about to get poked in the eye”.
And usually it hurt.
So the lime lipstick is a reward for being a good girl in the Doctor’s office?
@Shra … Frangelico, I hope! :-0
CAM, not very likely, unfortunately… with the way the Doughnut Shop is going, I say we’re lucky to get coffee!!!
Now, when it comes to the filling or the sprinkles on the doughnuts, that is a completely different issue: corporate endorsements take you a long way these days!