I’m gonna eat your heart! Uh, is that it?

June 25, 2010


Welcome to another installment of our popular feature, Folks Who Didn’t Pay Attention in Anatomy Class.

Meet Nicolas, a French convict whose problems began when he simply asked his cellmate to wash his hands after he used the toilet.

VALENTINE-BRUSSELS/It appears the cellmate declined, so Nicolas reacted as we all do when we’ve just had enough. He strangled his cellmate and cut open his chest.

Okay, here’s where the anatomy thing comes in. Nicolas rips out a piece of his cellmate’s lung, eats it raw, then cooks the rest, BECAUSE HE THINKS IT’S THE GUY’S HEART!

Imagine his embarrassment at finding out he ate the wrong organ, and at having to spend the next 30 years being called “Stupid Lung-Eater” by the other inmates.

One other thing. Imagine the pathetic homemade Valentine’s Day cards Nicolas sends home from prison.

“What’s that, honey, another lung card from Uncle Nick? Just tape it up on the fridge, dear…”

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Top: Undated publicity photo from the film “Hannibal.” REUTERS/Phil Bray/Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer )

Right: A vendor in a chocolate shop holds up Belgian praline boxes made for Valentine’s Day in Brussels in a 2007 file photo. REUTERS/Yves Herman

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He was probably distraught over France’s early exit from the World Cup!

Posted by Jibberish | Report as abusive

Ummm… heart… lung… is that what you want to treat me with on my last day, BG?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Don’t you think some abs and buns and/or some great shoes would have been nice for Shra? There is still time, BG.

Does make me wonder how he was able to cook in his cell. And what ever does he keep on hand for seasoning?

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

C’mon, bob. Give Shra a few pix of the human body’s largest organ. Um … I mean the skin.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

This just gets grosser… et grosser… et tres grosser… 😀

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Well, I hope he at least ate the right lung. It would be even more embarrassing to have eaten the wrong one.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Yes, to have eaten the wrong lung would have been scillia. But to have eaten an eye would have been cornea!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Nicholas didn’t cook in his cell Onedoor. His cellmate went through two packs a day of Marlboro, so his lung was smoked.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

If the French prisoner’s name were Phillippe Philloppe, would he have been unable to to make up his mind which lung to eat?

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

I like the defense attorney’s implied statement – the system failed, so my client killed a guy and ate his lung. AND he LIKED it!

Wow. Maybe he had read one too many OE Blogs and seen the pictures of snake-eaters and figured he just had to try it. Not enough donuts in the world. Nooo siree.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Well, Shra, the subject is Gross Anatomy. And one part of Gross Anatomy covers THE SKIN. C’mon Bob, SHOW SHRA (and E, and Spin, and CG, and Sarabelle, and MamaC) SOME SKIN (or, alternatively, at least some shoes ~yawn~)! Let’s get this party started!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

You’re not paying attention, Doc. I just posted a new item, a guy with plenty of skin showing. Of course, I just know there will be something wrong with it….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

He also said shoes, BG… but did you heed his advice????

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Firstly, it it just me, or does that lung/heart thing sound like a haggis recipe?

Secondly, oh! THAT’S why actresses and all are so skinny! So actors can hold thme like that as if they weigh nothing. NOW it makes sense…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

What a mental image…yuck!

Posted by vwgal | Report as abusive

Spin, I was thinking of the same song!!! Great minds think alike, eh?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

unca… dont you get me started!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I love you with all my lung.

Posted by creigh | Report as abusive