It’s another razzle-dazzle death!

July 18, 2010

POLAND/

Blog Guy, you seem to be the only one really covering those Government Death Panels that were created by the health reform law.

SAUDI-ARABIA/I guess like most federal agencies, they’ve probably settled into a certain predictable sameness by now, right?

Far from it, reader. Instead of just trying to get by doing as little as possible, as I’ve been told some government workers do, the Death Panels are competing with each other for the most spectacular kills.

Nobody would ever have guessed this level of theatrical showmanship would have evolved so quickly.

Here are some recent shots of the Death Panels in action as they carry out their Grand Guignol-style responsibilities.

But Blog Guy, these photos are grotesque! Sledge hammers? Bricks? Armor? Bull machines?

death panel bulls 280Can’t we get these Death Panel folks to go back to just using plain old guns, like they used to?

What, and leave show business?

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Top: Men acting as knights re-enact during a celebration to mark the 600th anniversary of The Battle of Grunwald in Grunwald, northern Poland, July 15, 2010. REUTERS/Kacper Pempel

Right: Martial arts performer of the Dragon show team, holds a brick over his head while his teammate prepares to break it during a public performance in Riyadh, July 16, 2010. REUTERS/Fahad Shadeed

Left: A child is chased by a toy bull during festivities at the bullring in Pamplona on the eighth day of San Fermin festival, July 13, 2010. REUTERS/Joseba Etxaburu

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36 comments

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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by robert basler and Oddly Enough, eBusiness BPO Inc.. eBusiness BPO Inc. said: It’s another razzle-dazzle death! http://bit.ly/dqty0O [...]

Bagpipers playing the “Chicken Dance” while the selected dance in 100 degree heat. It’s not the heat, it’s the stupidity that killed ‘em.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

One, I like it! That qualifies as a Totentanz in the Theatre of the Absurd!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

The path of the warrior is long and winding, and difficult for mere mortals to comprehend.

Or something.

Can you get an “after” shot of the sledgehammer-sword-brick affair?

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Umm… Dragon? Really??

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Dave, I have an after shot, but it’s much too gruesome. Trust me, you don’t want to see it.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

I’m thinking he has a splitting head, er headache.

Thanks,Doc. Don’t tell Shra I looked up the meaning of Totentnaz or she will think I learned something and AAAAAH! Pardon me while I recover.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Tell me about it, One…. I’m already scared enough after using Grand Guignol in today’s post….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Ingmar Bergman’s Totentanz at the end of The Seventh Seal.

http://www.mondaviarts.org/press/press_u ploads/2007/seventh_seal_1.jpg

Back in my youth, I once taught a film class on Bergman’s films. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ingmar_Berg man

I was afraid the students would hate it, being in Swedish with subtitles and all. They were so intrigued that they loved it. And so did I.

And remember, if Death challenges you to a game of chess for your life, counter-challenge him to a game of badminton!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid= 3803584387889303730#

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Are Death Squads necessary? Consider: There are 91,000,000,000 gallons of fresh water trapped in people!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Poor kid, he didn’t even have a chance to grow up and discover women are actually pretty cool and not the cootie ridden icky things he thinks they are at that age. I wonder what he did to earn a visit from the death panel.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

As I understand it, he called some woman a cootie ridden icky thing. What’s your home address, Ifly?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

That’s an average of 13 gallons per person. As we know from this blog, there are lots of people who simply are a waste of 13 gallons of fresh water.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Hmmm Mr. B. you must have been a very early *bloomer*. At that age, I was still giving myself cootie shots on a regular basis just as a precaution.

My home address is:
123 Nodateslately Lane
Singlesville, NY

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

It was a good thing I did look up the word as I thought Totentanz were those pesky insects that carried off picnic food.

Wonderful film, Doc. An outhouse without spiderwebs or flies was impressive, and that was just for starters.

ifly, just hang in there youngster.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Unca, you’re talking crazy! You got serious on us. Maybe your electrolytes are out of balance. From a lack of fresh water, maybe?

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

@Onedoor! FTW.

I refuse to look up any words I see here, as it is forbidden to learn anything from this blog.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

That’s a very smart policy, Dave. You’ll note I included a hyperlink with Grand Guignol today, but it’s a trap. It just goes automatically to Shra’s taser, even if she’s off baking scones.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Totentanz….. Tontos long lost brother?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

@Dave, I just said I looked them up. I didn’t say I found or remembered them. I mean, I thought it meant insects! ifly thinks it is Tonto’s brother. These worda are in the local phone book, right? Lots of pictures in the yellow pages, too!

Although FTW not a bad idea some days, and this could be one of them…

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Oh dear, Mr. B. I was orignally drawn to this blog because of its superior literary and emphatically moral tone. NOW, however, I tremble at the kind of social/mental unravelling it seems to encourage among your afficiondos. Please be assured that my coven and I, amid incantations, will be sacrificing 3 chickens and one reluctant goat to restore down-home clarity to your bunch. As we prance around the bonfire, we will chant for them all: the Shoe Woman, the clever quack (doc), the planeless pilot, the restless (?)uncle, the lonely spinster, the optionless (one-door) sweetheart, and the other colorful, if fragile, contributors to your unsettling blog.
In short, Mr. B, you are not alone in this clean-up mission, BP had help. You do too.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

@Onedoor – that was actually “for the win”, not the other FTW you are thinking about…

Don’t worry about the taser, it only hurts for a little while.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Lady! Missed ya! No sacrifices for me, thank you! I am still wacky, not learning anything, still believe in the White Hat Conspiracy, still having my meds every day and …. yes! dreaming of Mr.Fab Abs and shoes!!

Ok… now Doc… I see a lot of hyperlinks on your post… and hyperlinks mean knowledge…
A lot of people here seem to be learning… So, you are all gonna be zapped…!!

BG, you are included! Mwahahahahaha!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

@Dave: LOL! Would I be thinking the other? Hm. Love ya.

Now if I can just dodge Shra and her tingley AAAAAHHHHGG!

Nevermind.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

My Dad took my Mum to see The Seventh Seal for their first date.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

No way!

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

I remember one student in the class I mentioned who came up to me after we watched the Seventh Seal. He asked: “Why did the University offer a class on such obscure films?” My response: “Obscure to you!”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Explains a lot huh ?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Jeez Crow, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say. The most bothersome thing about it is that IF it’s true, they never bothered to make up a more acceptable first date story to tell their daughter.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Since when was a movie an unacceptable first date ?!

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

My parents may well have gone to watch a movie called “Wild Strawberries” on their first date. Only, it wasn’t Ingmar Bergman’s film “Wild Strawberries”….

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

I believe I took my wife to see a movie called “Willard” on our first date. It was about a guy who used rats to kill people.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

My mom and dad didnt see any movie on their first date…
They sat at home, surrounded by relatives and talked….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

My parents met at a dance. My Dad asked my Mom out, and she said yes. But my maternal Grandfather really didn’t like my Dad, so he invited some other guy over to the house to see Mom when Mom was supposed to go out with Dad. And Grandpa wanted Mom to go out with the other guy.

So my Dad shows up, and my Grandfather meets him at the well and tells him to get lost, leave Henry County, go back to Defiance County, and never come back. My Uncle (Mom’s brother) hears this. Grandpa goes back in the house.

My Dad and my Uncle didn’t like the Bozo Grandpa invited over, and they didn’t want Mom going out with him, so they jacked up the other guy’s car and put blocks under the rear axle, so that when he tried to drive away, the car wouldn’t go anywhere.

Gramps didn’t pull that stunt again.

True story.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

The animosity wasn’t all on my Mom’s side either. My paternal Grandmother told my Mom that she could not marry my Dad. Grandma wouldn’t hear of it. Mom didn’t take crap from anybody, and certainly not from Grandma.

These two families were not exactly the Hatfields and McCoys (or Montagues and Capulets), but they were close enough, being two leading families in adjacent counties.

To this day, the rivalry continues, although in sports contests between two rival high schools. My Dad’s family (the faction with which I include myself) refers to basketball and football games between the two schools as “The Henry County Jihad.”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Hey, I’ve heard of the Hatfields and the McCoys. I feel all well read now. :)

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

I know of the Montagues and the Capulets… can I be considered well- read too?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive