Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Don’t poke that shark in the eye, Lamar

July 30, 2010

jaws publicity girl 490

As some of you know, a string of shark sightings in recent weeks has rattled swimmers in Massachusetts, and is evoking memories of the “Jaws” movie hysteria.

Officials in the Cape Cod town of Chatham have warned beach-goers to stay close to shore after “numerous” sightings of great white sharks.

jaws poster 240The town is advising, on its Website, “If a shark is sighted, please get out of the water.”

WHOA! Slow down, I can’t take notes that fast. So you’re saying if I’m actually IN the water, and I see a great white shark, I should go ahead and get OUT, huh?

Thank the Lord I read this, because my plan had been to just avoid making eye contact with the thing.

Who on EARTH is that advice aimed at, and do we really care what happens to them?

Hell, it’s fine with me if somebody that stupid stands in the water wearing a bloody fish parts necklace and blowing a vuvuzela at the top of his lungs.

I have a cynical hunch this warning may be aimed at attracting as many stupid people as possible. They come, spend their vacation money and then they get eaten. It’s the life cycle.

Meanwhile, if you’re too young to remember the 1975 “Jaws” phenomenon, rent the DVD.

Or better yet, just listen to the soundtrack.

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Top: “Jaws” publicity photo

Right: “Jaws” poster

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Comments

Water. It’s the new (old?) annoying white bar.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

Stare a tiger in the eye,
Hit a shark on the nose,
Toss a dwarf by the belt.

Sage advice.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive
 

BAH-dum

BAAH-dum

BAAAH-dum bah-dum

BAAH-dum bah dum bah-dum

BAH-dumbah-dumbah-dumbah-dum

AAAAHHHHHRRRRGGGGG!!!!

Oh wait..no, my mistake…just a piece of seaweed brushed against my foot.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

LOL!!!!!!! Loved that one, Mr.Pilot!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

@Spin: to be followed up with..
“Umm..where did my bathing suit go?”

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

@ifly: Congrats on being the first on this blog to present the musical score of a hit movie! Didn’t see it myself, but now I’m hummin’ it, complete with the chorus of AAARRGGH.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

Lala, you’ve never seen Jaws? Seriously?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Which part of that lady is the pink bit between arm and cleavage? Is that an already dismembered bit?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

Man, is that some kind of skinny arm?!?!

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive
 

It’s catchy isn’t it ladylala? Try humming it next time you go to the beach!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

@Guru Bob: In answer to your question: Nope, have never seen “Jaws”. “My Dinner with Andre” came out around then, so I was busy.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

Oh, well, then you’ve had a similar experience. The characters in “Jaws” suffered a far more merciful fate than the folks who sat through “Andre.”

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Right you are, Guru B. I still have existential toothmarks all over me.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

@justcam: its the new bait to hunt sharks

Posted by Insane | Report as abusive
 

When Jaws first came out, I was working as a projectionist in a theater where it showed for 21 weeks straight! By the time the run was over, I was opening up the spare projection window and screaming a split second before the really scary parts.
My punishment was 34 weeks of ‘In Search of Noah’s Ark’!

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive
 

He he he he… that musta been fun, Jazz… ;)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Ha ha that’s awesome Jazz! While serving your time with ‘In Search of Noah’s Ark’ did you open the window and yell “I bet they still don’t find it!”?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Nah, it was back to studyin’, readin’ & puttin’ the moves on the concession girls.

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive
 

That sure is company time well spent! Did ya hit is off with any of the concession girls?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Are we gonna get into baseball references here Spin? :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

If Jazz was at an age where he was puttin’ the moves on the concession girls, the age of innocence was loooong past Spin. :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Jazz,did you actually want these 2 to dissect your comment, to shreds?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

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