Election Day de-feet for politicians?

August 21, 2010


Blog Guy, I just found out there’s an election underway in Australia. Can you explain how the process works down there?

Sure. As far as I’m aware, it’s a unique electoral system. They dangle the candidates from ropes over a pool of water with a huge saltwater crocodile in it, and the one he doesn’t eat becomes prime minister.

australia crop 240That’s cruel! It’s barbaric!

Not really, the crocodile actually enjoys it.

So the candidate who is left alive is the big winner, huh?

I hadn’t thought of it that way before, but I guess if you believe being Prime Minister of Australia is better than slowly being pulled apart by a crocodile, then yes.

But let’s say the crocodile is very fast, and he eats BOTH candidates. Who becomes prime minister then?

As you can see here, the third option is Prime Minister Oven Roasted Chicken. It’s a nice compromise.

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Dirty Harry, a saltwater crocodile, picks a chicken under a caricature of Australia’s Prime Minister Julia Gillard in Darwin August 19, 2010. Given the choice of two dead chickens, one with Gillard’s face stuck on the carcass and the other with conservative opposition leader Tony Abbott’s face. REUTERS/Wade Huffman-Crocosaurus Cove/Handout

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Posted by Election Politics | Report as abusive

Crocodile Rock the Vote!

Dangling Chads could have a whole new meaning over there.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Mmmm, nothing like a dangling raw chicken to look forward to. Blech. Am glad I had breakfast before I saw it. Though hanging breakfast not a bad idea! Toast on a rope.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Behold, a vision: sprinkled donuts dangling from strings. The vision fades. But wait. What’s this? Oooohh. A donut! Nom, nom. And now my flossing is done, too!

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Wow, there are really pictures of the candidates above those chickens. The Australians really take this stuff seriously. Next they’ll consult several local witch doctors and do a seance to consult their ancestors.

The things happening in this picture make reason #752 for not EVER visiting Australia. Boxing kangaroos are also on the list…

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

One of the headlining stories on Reuters is about how Australia might be on it’s way to a hung parliment. Considering this blog that does not sound like it will turn out well.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Nice one, Unca! It’s a shame Shra and Crow are off on that secret weekend mission.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

@sarabelle: just imagine shopping for a pair of crocs over there!

Hi, Unca! I know, it isn’t the same as Shra’s hello’s but I haven’t got anything to zap you with, either! Other pain inducing implements will remain nameless…

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

We have a freebie?!? No taser for teaching? I think I’ll write a comment on how to sweat copper water pipe. No, how to wire a four way switch. No, how to install a toilet. That’s it. That’s the ticket. And I’ll discuss some common pitfalls of toilet installation. Maybe Bob will let me borrow that photo of Eugene “Toilet Head” Johnson.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Get a grip, Doc. Are you insane?

Shra will be back bright and early tomorrow, and do you really think she doesn’t know how to scroll down to earlier posts?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Nobbb tibe to talb nob, Bob. I’b trbib to swib ubstream wib a toibeb seab abounb myb neb. Oh, crab….

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Silly Doc! You should either be sitting on the toilet seat or have it around your waste, er waist. Use that wax ring thingy to paddle with.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Okay, now that I have thoroughly explored how not to install a loo, I think I’ll write a periodi column how things that can go wrong with loo installations. I think I’ll call it “Around the Bend, with Dr. Doll.”

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

I see there have been attempta at teaching and my zapper being called to the rescue… well… maybe I would let you hacve a freebie Doc… VERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYY TIRED!!!!! YAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NNN!

As for the crocodile… jeez! Leave the animales alone!!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Shra is getting WAY too patient. It’s time to move on to another Old Testament zapper….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Mr.B…. I am warning you… you threaten to take away my zapper and I will zap you to within an inch of your blog writing capacity!

I need a medi-donut! NOW!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ok! Everyone here is getting a zap! You may think you have done nothing to deserve it, but I believe otherewise…
Why? Who am I to think so? Why, I am the OSU Special Agent who weilds the zapper.. and no, I am NOT misusing the power I have..
I have been accused of being VERY forgiving and VERY patient.. and those are accusations I would NOT accept!!!!

So there, YOU have been zapped! (YOU know who YOU are)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Actually Shra, I’m trying to divert attention away from myself after using Hogarth’s Gin Lane in the Oktoberfest post today… It worked, too.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive