News, but not the serious kind
Go buy me a gunny, honey!
Okay Lamar, it’s your chance to shine. I put you in charge of our new spring line of purses, so what have you got? We want very classy, very upscale!
We’re going very utilitarian, Boss, because these days, women want to carry as much crap as they can in their purses.
Hmmm. What material are we talking about here? Suede? Alligator? Ostrich?
Burlap, Boss. Burlap is the new alligator!
This girl here in the blue blouse is carrying what we call “The Poacher’s Friend.” It holds two live bobcats comfortably, and fits right on her shoulder.
Live bobcats? I don’t know, Lamar. What else do you have?
Lots of styles, Boss. We got “The Gunny Sack,” “The Looter,” “The Freshman’s Dirty Laundry…”
I see. And what is this woman in the green blouse carrying, Lamar? The really huge purse?
You’ve got a great eye for quality, Boss! It’s the top of our line, an exact copy of the one the professionals used for Jimmy Hoffa’s body.
Very impressive! Does it have a name, Lamar?
You bet, Boss! We call this one “The Shallow Unmarked Grave.” You think your Missus would like one?
Models present creations at the Michael Kors Spring 2011 collection during New York Fashion Week, September 15, 2010. REUTERS photos by Brendan McDermid