Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

A business engrave danger?

October 5, 2010

Blog Guy, you’re always way ahead of the curve on business and the economy. I’d love to hear your take on the failure of Lehman Brothers. Panic? Bad investments? Greed?

Nah, it was their business cards.

lehman card 490

Excuse me? I read all the Reuters blogs, and nobody else ever mentioned that.

Most of our bloggers are scared to death of the powerful business card engraving industry. But the fact is, near the end Lehman Brothers was issuing business cards that were so massive it took two guys just to carry one, like in the photo above.

business cards tim 320That’s not a sound model for staffing levels, but it evolved when our own government officials started one-upping each other with super-sized cards.

Look, I worked in Asia, where presenting your business card was a ritual involving finesse and style. Now look at these ham-handed Lehman cards so big they have to be stored in a fricking coffin.

Thank you for that insight, Blog Guy. I’m surprised you don’t get a better spot on that analysis and opinion page. By the way, this card only says Lehman Brothers. Shouldn’t it have a name and phone number on it?

That’s on the second card. The two guys bringing that one got stuck in traffic.

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Top: Christie’s employees pose for a photograph with a Lehman Brothers sign at Christie’s in London, September 24, 2010. REUTERS/Andrew Winning

Left: Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner places his name card on the table as he testifies before the Congressional Oversight Panel on Capitol Hill in Washington, June 22, 2010. REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque

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Comments

And the girl would have to be primitive to use it, Spin.. you know.. use a chisel and hammer to carve in her dance partner’s name…
Somehow makes me think of the Flintstones…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Some of those Lehman types tried to fool the Big Boss here in the Underworld, by offering to sell their souls to get the company out of debt.
Of course, the Big Boss knew that none of them had any souls in the first place, hence the mess they had allowed to occur.
By our reckoning, Christies will need to get about $US 3 Trillion for that sign.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

Yabba-dabba-dooooo! I say ladies, may I have this dinosaur dance?

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

Only if you get that dinosaur off you, Dave!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

What I didn’t notice in the previous blog on the subject..

http://blogs.reuters.com/oddly-enough/20 10/06/24/i-can-kill-a-man-with-my-busine ss-card/

..that Mr. Geithner is not presenting his business card, he is performing the Vulcan Two Finger Card Flick of Death! That’s how he plans to take over the country, one paper cut at a time!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

A guy was driving along a cliff top, when he comes across a man standing next to a broken barrier, with skid marks leading up to it.
Thinking something bad may have happened, he stops, gets out and goes over to the man, who is weeping inconsolably.
‘What happened?’ the concerned guy asks the weeping man.
‘A busload of Lehman Brothers executives has just gone over the cliff’, splutters the man.
‘What’s so bad about that?’ asks the guy, who lost his shirt with the company.
‘There were five empty seats!’ wails the man.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

@Spin and Shra: WHAT!!?? Dance-cards are out of style?? How do you girls keep track of your swains and suitors at the cotillion?

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

@ Spin: thanks for trying to lure me into this century. It’s all so bewildering.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive
 

Indeed, Lala, I’m with you on this. I have been desperately seeking Shra’s dance card to sign up but haven’t been able to. Perhaps next time she’s in Switzerland I will get lucky??

Posted by justM | Report as abusive
 

Simple, lady! I dont have one.. ;)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Spin, just because you say it’s a true story doesn’t mean it really is. I for one don’t believe a word of it.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

OMG are we really so old that Facebook is “old-fashioned” media???

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Geez could ya imagine having to wear a “Hello, my name is…” lapel pin at a business conference?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

I wouldnt do it, Mr.Pilot.. nah uh! You aint getting my name outta me, if I dont want to give it.. No siree!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Sammich boards? Wait, we are still under the assumption everything is made of stone yes?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

But wait, Spin. If it’s made of stone wouldn’t it be both stationery AND stationary?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

That’s a very good point, spin. I would prefer those new business cards printed on helium balloons. Inflationary stationery is the way to go.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

And now it is all clear as to why the members of our government are so screwed up! They switched over to helium ballon business cards and have all be inhaling the helium themselves!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

As punishment for foolish behavior during class, the Lehman Brothers (Barry and Sven) were forced to carry a large, very heavy sign back and forth in front of their school…

Posted by justK | Report as abusive
 

Lala, bonus points for the use of the word “cotillion”. :)

“And the girl would have to be primitive to use it, Spin.. you know.. use a chisel and hammer to carve in her dance partner’s name…” – Carve it where ?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive
 

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