It’s lard work, but someone has to do it…
Blog Guy, I enjoyed your report a few days ago about President Obama eating doughnuts.
How does that work? Does he just walk along and suddenly say, “I’d really like to clog my arteries with a load o’ fried dough about now!” and then they scramble to find a bakery for him?
Nothing could be further from the truth. It’s all very carefully planned. I know this because – just between us – for the past two years I have worked as Obama’s JFAD.
JFAD? I’m not familiar with Washington acronyms.
Oh, sorry. Junk Food Advance Dude.
Awesome! Are you even supposed to be talking about this?
No, but you wouldn’t be on the Internet if you weren’t a good person, so I’m comfortable with sharing.
I crisscross the country looking for the grossest, puffiest, richest, most grease-oozing food I can find, and then his people plan political trips around the stuff.
If there’s a deep fryer, a crackling vat of bubbling lard, a gooey cinnamon bun, a fried Twinkie, heck, even a simple lump of rising dough somewhere out in this great land of ours, I’m on it.
Golly. How long do you think you’ll keep the job?
Well, my current cholesterol level is 820, so you do the math.
Wow! That’s a very high price to pay for your country.
On the contrary, it’s the yeast I can do….
Top: President Barack Obama at a doughnut shop in Seattle, October 21, 2010. REUTERS/Kevin Lamarque
Obama tastes a kringle in the O and H Danish Bakery in Racine, Wisconsin, June 30, 2010. REUTERS/Larry Downing
Obama is served fried chicken as he visits Mrs. Wilkes’ Dining Room in Savannah, Georgia, March 2, 2010. REUTERS/Larry Downing
Obama: Obama picks up a cookie as he shops for snacks at Garcia’s Bakery and Deli in West Tisbury, Martha’s Vineyard, August 30, 2009. REUTERS/Jason Reed
Obama eats a snack in his limousine after stepping off Air Force One as he arrives in Dresden, Germany, June 4, 2009.