Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
What the hell have those kids done now?
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Blog Guy, it’s been two whole months since you’ve seen a sign of the approaching Apocalypse. Isn’t it about time to lower the threat level for your readers?
Hardly. If anything, it’s time to raise it. I don’t know if you’ve spotted the trend, but Earth has been caving in rapidly this year, with craters and sinkholes appearing from nowhere, overnight. Suddenly, the surface of our planet looks like the face of a teenager on a French fry diet.
The latest was this crater seen above, which appeared two days ago in the middle of a residential neighborhood in Germany.
From nowhere? Where does that word crater come from, anyway?
Well, I can’t be bothered to look it up, but I believe these things are named after Judge Crater, perhaps the most famous missing person of the 20th century. He disappeared in 1930, and it was as if he was just swallowed up by a hole….
But anyway, this is one of many. Here’s another one in Guatemala, and one in China. Some 480,000 people have disappeared into them in the first 10 months of this year.
Astounding! Nearly half a million people? What’s your source on that, Blog Guy?
I just made it up, but it seems about right, what with these holes popping up everywhere. There are a bunch of people I haven’t heard from this year, and I figure that’s what happened to them.
Blog Guy, your casual approach to facts and figures may explain why some people don’t consider this blog a solid news source. Please be more careful. So where does the word sinkhole come from?
True story. It dates back to 1872, when Jethro Sinkhole, a door-to-door lunch meat salesman, disappeared one morning on his….
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Top: A general view of a large crater that appeared in the early hours in the central German town of Schmalkalden, November 1, 2010. REUTERS/Alex Domanski
Left: A giant sinkhole caused by the rains of Tropical Storm Agatha is seen in Guatemala City May 31, 2010. More than 94,000 people have been evacuated as the storm buried homes under mud, swept away a highway bridge near Guatemala City and opened up sinkholes in the capital. REUTERS/Casa Presidencial/Handout
Local residents look at a sinkhole near Qingquan primary school in Dachegnqiao town of Ningxiang, Hunan province June 15, 2010. The hole, 500 feet wide and 50 yards deep, has been growing since it first appeared in January and has destroyed 20 houses so far. No causalities has been reported and the reason for the appearance of the hole remains unclear, local media reported. REUTERS/Stringer
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Heh, most of the world understands how sinkholes occur, but in China, “the reason for the appearance of the hole remains unclear”.
I’d be mad as hell if that was my very nice yard in Germany that is being swallowed.
In honor of Spin, a Haiku (of sorts) –
Honking big sinkholes
The earth swallows us all soon
China has rain too
So, you think we are all gonna disappear into a giant crater, like we will actually be gobbled up by Earth?
Now, wait a minute!! 2012 Apocalypse said something else!!!
Business has been so good in these troubled times, that the Lord of the Underworld has had to outsource soul-collection to private contractors, and sadly this is the shonky nature of some of their work.
The Big Boss was not all pleased when the new ‘soul collection’ expressways accidently became public.
Hey, BG, do you think these sinkholes could be caused by that galactic alignment thingy I keep reading about?
@Dave, I would be even more upset if that was my parkplatz or my auto that the sinkhole swallowed! After all, a yard will grow back, but a parking spot is forever!
Nosmo: do the accidents on the public expressways also assist the soul collectors?
Dave: the poet and philosopher emerges! You must have had a doughnut!
Shra: Hi! It is nice reading your comments again. Keep that tazer polished.
Jibberish: Good morning! Why, yes, I have had my coffee and am rambling on… If the sinkhole took my car, it would probably spit it back out:)
BG: You know I just have to tell you good morning.
Sometimes I wonder…what if BG is typing a blog and boom! he goes 100 feet down! :O
@One – yes, my qi is better aligned after having a few donuts. Now how about sharing that coffee?
Qi is a good Scrabble word to know. The drawback is that it’s not in all dictionaries, so if your house has a 1970s dictionary, you’re SOL if someone challenges you!
My everything is better after a few doughnuts!!!
Mr. B. you have to rethink your design on the prototype BT-67. Hydrogen fuel cells don’t seem to be working out. Those impact craters are impressive though! While Lamar will be missed I am sure the cloning facilities will have him back up and running soon.
Its only on Scrabble, Jib… the first time I found it I actually wondered what it was!
Now, I pull out the big guns with it!
Fwd, you better hope that does NOT happen to BG… we would all have to head to the nearest mental health institutions where the doughnuts are pathetic!!
Yay, Nosmo used the word “shonky”. I’m happy.
I don’t know, Crow. We’re playing with a world of painful tasing here…
@Spinster: Madam, in reference to your recent Haiku # Deux–how dare you trivialize my love for Lamar! I herewith have at you with a couplet:
How long would I grieve for my Lamar?
Quoth the Lady, “Evermar!”
Lala, now you’re a Raven lunatic…
What, now we get tased for finding something funny?!
@Mr B: And you, Sir, have poe judgment.
Poe judgment. Do I have great readers, or what?
@Crowgirl – I think the tasing will be in line for making us learn what “shonky” means. Of course, if your electric fence is functioning, you can just go give it a grab instead…
No, you dont CG…. Mr.B was just joshing ya….
That’s correct Spin…
and of course, everyone should be scared of the taser…
There is only one rule on the OE blog…
“No teaching, no preaching, no learning!”
That sounds like three rules, Shra…
They are all under one title.. so, its one rule…