Basket o’ Death claims another victim?

November 5, 2010

Blog Guy, what’s the most common method of suicide in this country?

It varies according to sex. Women most often poison themselves, and men tend to watch several episodes of  “Glee,” back-to-back.


That’s horrible! And what about in other countries?

Most commonly it’s the “Basket o’ Death.”

cigarette crop 240Yikes! How does that work?

I hate to go into much detail for fear of becoming one of those, you know, assisted death sites.

I understand your reluctance, Blog Guy, but those sites are very successful. They make lots of money, you know.

Really? Well, I guess folks have to learn somewhere, right? Okay, a despondent person fills a dry wicker basket with bits of straw and shredded paper until it’s very combustible, then puts it on their head and smokes a cigarette. Death is quick, but painful.

So you’re saying a spark from your cigarette spreads to the wicker and paper and straw, and the whole thing ignites on your skull, which implodes from the intense heat?

Of course not. Are you nuts? The tobacco kills you. Cigarettes are deadly, Dude!

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A laborer lights a cigarette as he walks through a fruit and vegetable market in Lahore October 28, 2010. REUTERS/Mohsin Raza

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Whew! When I read the headline initially, I thought you might be doing something on those death panels again. I knew that couldn’t be so, in fact, given the recent election, I expect you to be doing a “no more death panels” post very soon. Errr, maybe not.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Thats right… Cigarette smoking is baaaaaaaaaaaddd!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by robert basler, Oddly Enough and cabun, eBusiness BPO Inc.. eBusiness BPO Inc. said: Basket o’ Death claims another victim? […]

Posted by Tweets that mention Basket o’ Death claims another victim? | Analysis & Opinion | — | Report as abusive

Do we get to see a photo of whatever flew out of the basket when it comes back to nest? Hope the guy didn’t make off with a nest containing an egg, as it could be a very large, angry bird coming back for it!

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

We don’t even get matches in the asylum. If we behave for a few months we can post a few comments but even Shra’s taser is nothing compared to what they do to us if we’re caught with .. No, no sir, that’s not a donu

Posted by dazedconfused | Report as abusive

Happy Diwali,Shra! Imagine the Tandoori Chicken you could make with that giant bird! Use the taser to light some candles and keep that smile brilliant, too! Ok, not the taser for the smile…

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

It’s his effort to go green. With the destruction of so many trees birds have fewer and fewer places to nest. This man, ever so environmentally conscious, has donated his cranium to the National Wildlife Association.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Thanks, One!! :)
Oh, yeah, and cigarette smoking is bad! Save yourselves, DONT light yourselves up!
You can light up some candles though! :)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Cigarettes are bad, Shra? I had no idea… I guess you learn something every day.

@everyone else, shhhhhh, quiet, I think she might fall for it this time and think she taught someone something!

On an unrelated note, and in a quest to learn about this blog, has the zapper ever zapped herself? It seems like an obvious double standard if she hasn’t…

Posted by shawngrggs | Report as abusive

Smoking obviously leads to hell in a death basket. 😉

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

Am I the only female who gets brain cancer after seeing even three minutes of Glee?

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

Shawn, like I explained earlier.. the zapper cant be zapped…like it or not…
as for that learning thing, you knew that, so, dont pin it on me…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Laser, Taser, what about a Daser? You know, a gun that shoots doughnuts. That would make things a lot safer here around the asylum.

Get fired up! Join the OE Blog Network!

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

Great idea, CAM! With facial recognition, so that the proper sprinkles can be automatically added on launch! I like the sillycybin sprinkles best. Pretty colors!

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Mark my words, Shra, before this blog is done, you WILL zap yourself. I don’t know when, and I don’t know how… but it’s gonna happen.

Posted by shawngrggs | Report as abusive

@ATJ: I’ll start work on the prototype today. You may have to help me w/ammo. :-)

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

A tisket, a tasket, that guy’s sure to blow a gasket …

But I would like that model hat for the Easter parade.

Posted by slick9 | Report as abusive

Hope that guy is careful where he tosses that match, otherwise he might end up a little light-headed.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Very nice hat… How many birds do you think have their nests there?


Posted by SimpleGuy | Report as abusive

Sarabelle; dunno, I’ve happily never seen it, but it sounds awful.

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive