Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Get the Lobo, Bobo, we’re drivin’ to Cabo!
Email 
Print
I love this story, and I’m not even making it up.
The president of Ford’s subsidiary in Mexico says his company’s Lobo pickup trucks are so popular with drug cartel hitmen that regular people are now afraid to drive the trucks and risk having soldiers and police mistake them for criminals.
Which is why Lobo sales have – you’ll excuse the expression – slumped.
“It’s a vehicle that is in high demand for committing crimes,” the Ford guy said. “There’s plenty of space in the pickup’s cabin for more weapons.”
Again, not making up that quote.
Personally, I think folks are being short-sighted. Maybe it’s just my sunny disposition, but to me, this is one of those “Is the gun half-loaded or half empty?” sort of deals.
You do the math. Mexico’s drug war has killed more than 31,000 people in four years. So does it LOOK like you have to worry much about what the soldiers and police think?
My advice is, buy a Lobo and enjoy la vida loca for once!
Cut to the front of the McDonald’s drive-thru window at lunch. Who’s going to stop you? Want to park in the middle of an intersection and pick up your dry cleaning? Hey, a little professional courtesy here!
And instead of crying like a bunch of big babies, why isn’t Ford exploiting its good fortune?
They should be running TV commercials featuring testimonials from happy hitmen, showing how many corpses they can stack in a Lobo before they need to unload it. And here comes the James Earl Jones voiceover:
“Ford Lobo. Drive like somebody else’s life depends on it…”
Join the Oddly Enough blog network
Follow this blog on Twitter at rbasler
Top: Ford F150 pickup trucks sit in a parking lot at a dealership in Phoenix, Arizona April 1, 2009. REUTERS/Joshua Lott
Upper right: The 2005 Ford F-150 Lobo edition is seen in a handout photo. REUTERS/Ford/Handout
Lower right: A bullet-riddled truck used by drug hitmen is displayed to the media at a military base on the outskirts of Monterrey December 18, 2009. REUTERS/Tomas Bravo
Comments RSSPost Your Comment
-
Author Profile
-
As a former Lobo, aka, a graduate of the University of New Mexico, I believe that fine institution could make use of (or make light of) the attention surrounding these lovely, bullet-ridden vehicles.
Perhaps something like, “If you’re a Lobo, and you graduate cum laudo, you can get a good job, and buy your own Lobo!” I know, that’s probably not gonna cut it, but you get the drift!
Wow! Just look at the optional extras you can get with your Lobo:
- Easy-to-reach ammo storage
- Bling holders in place of cup holders
- Detachable machine gun mounts with the option of upgrading to rocket launcher mounts
- Combined radar/helicopter-gunship detector
- Plenty of underseat storage for your drug stash
- Lockbox for your drug money
- Emergency skunk-spray release in case your vehicle is being search by drug sniffer dogs
- Designer airbags, custom-built so they don’t damage your grill, or any other bling, when they deploy.
- And finally, free travel on Basler Airways for 12 months
Today only, we’re having a TRUCK EXPLOSION SALE!! That’s right…you heard us! These trucks are all reposessions from various drug dealers and criminals (donated by our local bomb disposal unit)…at discounts so deep, they might not even be legal! Here’s how it works, folks…Come on down to the dealership, choose your truck, and we’ll hand you the keys! If you can get into your truck and start the engine without it exploding, we’ll give it to you for half the sticker price!!
(Fine print): Not responsible for exploding trucks, dismemberment, burns, death, or damages occurring as a result of flying debris and/or fire. Also not responsible for mistaken identity which leads up to/may include shooting, stabbing, later explosions, kidnapping, beheading, or collection calls.
Nice group on the driver’s side. I wonder if they got him. Maybe these chuckleheads will all kill each other off and leave the rest of Mexico in peace. Shot of Patron, anyone?
The best part of this post is the sign saying, “Truck Explosion Sale.” Haha!
You mean the best part after the really funny text, right?
Well, since Lobo is Spanish for “wolf”, seems like an appropriate name.
After all, if the criminals wanted to be unnoticed, they’d drive the Escape!
I don’t know what you’re talking about, Sarabelle, the best part of this post is CLEARLY the funny tex-…. wait a minute, does that sign actually say “Truck Explosion Sale”?!?! That’s hilarious! I was totally wrong… that’s definitely the best part of the post.
Awww come on the Ford acronym was good! Thanks Mr. Spam Basket, now I got nothing. :p
Unca: gather the falling parts from the exploding trucks. Sell them and buy a non exploding vehicle. Maybe you can find a Pinto in Mexico for cheap. Happy landings!
Unca: JUST KIDDING! Enjoy the day and watch for falling parts if you travel toward the border.
Nosmo: Good lines:)