Tie me to the plank, Frank!

November 16, 2010

protest plank 490

Okay lads, it’s time we make our protest heard by those bloody politicians. They can’t raise our university tuition and get away with it!

Blimey, Nigel, you don’t mean… Not the plank!

plank party 220Yes. You fellows know the drill. Bring me a long wooden plank and a rope. And I need some really stupid chap, stripped naked.

By naked you mean wearing shoes and socks, right, Nigel?

Of course, Chauncey! We ARE British people, after all!

I say, Nigel, you’re really going through with this whole plank thing? The rope, the red loin cloth, the stupid tattoos, the blond wig?

Yes, Chauncey! As I said, we ARE British people! Tie those knots really well, so what’s-his-name can’t escape.

I believe he’s called Lamar.

Well, hurry up and finish straight away. We’re supposed to get a foot of snow tonight, so work smartly! We’ll come back when the snow melts in a fortnight, Lamar!

Now, who’s keen for some toad-in-the-hole and spotted dick whilst it snows?

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A demonstrator is tied to a plank of wood during a protest in central London November 10, 2010. A group of protesters against higher university tuition fees broke into the headquarters of Britain’s governing Conservative party on Wednesday, smashing the glass reception area and streaming up onto the roof. REUTERS/Toby Melville

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27 comments

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[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by robert basler, cabun. cabun said: [Oddly] Tie me to the plank, Frank! http://reut.rs/cDw6nD [...]

The mouse hover shows “plank 490″. Are you hiding us some facts, BG? Where are the 489 other crucifixees? and the 219 other “party” “goers”?

Posted by grok | Report as abusive

Curses, my little game is up!

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Methinks this post dost stinketh. Fetch me a sinker, knave Lamar. :-)

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

Eww… that is a weird guy… somebody call the ambulance and the mental hospital… he needs a quiet room and an IV drop of doughnuts…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Is “plank 490″ anything like “Blink 182″? :)

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

Just when I think I have this OE thing figured out, it throws me a curve-ball in the form of a bijillion doughnut references in a week. What’s the deal? Is someone here a baker?

Posted by shawngrggs | Report as abusive

Um, before anybody gets carried away with this PLANK490 stuff, what you’re seeing is my own naming convention for each photo I use in my blog. In this case the photo goes with the plank item, and is 490 pixels wide – indeed the maximum size I can use in our format without the blog actually exploding.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

What, and put my eight readers at risk?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

@shawn … we like doughnuts, don’t you? We’re also fond of white hats but, I dare not say too much. BG is listening.

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

Excuse me, you’re wrong again Blog Guy. You have nine readers.

And it’s clear those students spend their financial aid on tattoos.

Posted by slick9 | Report as abusive

OK, I can maybe see the tennies & socks, the tats and the (stuffed) codpiece, but is that a WIG?

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Am I reading this correctly? Is that a confirmed picture of Lamar? Please, let it be not true!

The only thing left to add to such a picture is the presence of a merkin.

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

Soemone ought to tell him that the semi-naked-except-for-black-socks-shoes- red-speedos-and-furry-hat look is not as attractive as he might have been led to believe. It is a good thing he is tied up, less chances of attacking unsuspecting folks.

Posted by I_dont_know_1 | Report as abusive

That smile on his face is just plain creepy. I think he’s getting into the whole rope thing a little too much.

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Shawn – You can never have this OE thing figured out. If you do, two things will HAVE to happen. First, Bas will have to change all the rules, since no on is allowed to know them, and second, Shra will hav to Tase you so that it doesn’t happen again. You REALLY don’t want to learn anything here.

Posted by inebgreen | Report as abusive

Sarabelle, relax. Lamar has many faces. Multiple personalities, as well. You will never nail him down. Well, I mean unless you actually nail him down.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Mr B, thank-you for the reassurance that Lamar “has many faces”. Disturbingly, some of your depictions are in violent contradiction of my rich fantasy life. (My care team, for your own safey, has warned you about doing that too often. HEED THEM.)
In my mind, Lamar is a modern day Ashley from GWTW–a sensitive, high-minded, poetic man of sterling character. A combination of Gandhi’s enlightenment and Mike Tyson’s right jab.
See now, what you been doing lately is mixing it up, showing me a skinny old guy who don’t know from. This creates anxiety in me, and as my care team told you, that’s not good.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

I’m sorry Ladylala, I do get it now. The next time you meet Lamar he’ll be a combination of Mike Tyson’s enlightenment and Gandhi’s right jab. Enjoy.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Thank-you, Mr B. Tonight, I sleep.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

Methinks BG has made the whole story up. This has to be an out take for some new Monty Python movie.

@Ladylala – step away from the donuts, that’s a good Lady, slowly now….

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Here I thought Lamar was the OEs version of Tyler Durden, a manifestion of Mr. B.s repressed memories of a third grade career fair. Instead of learning he might be a rocket man, an owner of his own airline, a cardinal, or on the council for the University of Wisconsin Almumi Association, Mr. B. was told his future was to blog for Oddly Enough. There he snapped and his counscious created Lamar, an outlet for his lifes “could have beens”.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Thank-you, Dave. I have always relied on the kindness of strangers.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

Lala; nice as that reference is, you can’t rely on them to nudge you away from doughnuts…

Mr B; Do not knock Toad in the Hole. Especially if it’s made with home made toad…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

First of all, all the Toad-in-a-holes I have seen, dont really resemble a toad sticking its head out of a hole…
Spotted Dick is actually quite tasty….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Maybe it means something different in Scotland, Shra.

Posted by knit_nurse | Report as abusive

Yeah Shra, it’s not actually meant to be green…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Which one CG? The toad or the dick?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive