News, but not the serious kind
One small step for man…aaaahhhhhh!!!
Blog Guy, you strike me as a guy who would like practical jokes.
No way. Too many of those things are cruel, sick, mean-spirited and make me cringe.
Oh come on, I can tell from the humor in your blog, you’ve contemplated some pretty funny tricks on your fellow man, even if you never went through with them.
Well, I have thought of a few impish monkeyshines now and then, sure.
That’s better. So go ahead and tell me one of them. What would you do?
Okay, but just between the two of us?
You have my word.
I guess maybe I’d find some really obnoxious guy, like a spammer or something, see, and ask if he wanted to be the first human to fly like a bird, with my “Super-Duper Jet-Fitted Flying Wing.”
So I’d strap this contraption on his back, see, and take him up in a hot air balloon, and he would stand on this platform. Then, when we got about a mile up, my friends and I would light the “jetpacks” on the wing, and tell him to jump off and fly.
Er, I’m not getting the joke, Blog Guy.
Sigh. The “flying wing” would just be a big heavy wooden board, and the “jetpacks” would be jumbo firecrackers from some highway stand in North Carolina. Imagine this guy’s surprise when he starts trying to fly! Priceless!
You know, Blog Guy, maybe you were right. Maybe you should stay away from practical jokes…
Oh, wait! Did I mention that the guy wouldn’t know it, but there would be a 5,000-foot bungee cord attached to his back, so at the last second before he hits the earth, he would…
Blog Guy, you actually dream of being a Loony Tunes cartoon character someday, don’t you?
Oh. Is it that transparent?
Left: Swiss airline pilot Yves Rossy, the first man in the world to fly under a jet-fitted wing, prepares to jump from a hot air balloon in Bercher, near Lausanne, Switzerland, November 5, 2010.
Right: Rossy speeds through the air to perform a loop near the balloon.
REUTERS photos by Laurent Gillieron/Pool