The 10 goofiest true stories of the year…

December 7, 2010

goofy wrap seats 490

Don’t tell anybody, but this was a pretty easy year for me.

Even though I write for a Serious News Organization, as a humor blogger I’m allowed to invent strange stuff because I don’t fool anybody, and it’s cheaper than giving me a travel budget.

But in 2010 I was blessed with so many great and goofy TRUE stories, I hardly had to use my imagination at all.


What a Goof-a-Ganza it was! How can you top wacky ideas like installing a toilet timer so workers have only 10 minutes to do their business? Or the genius who tried to smuggle 28 TONS of garlic?

And how about a serious and venerable history magazine changing its name to avoid a nasty sexual connotation, or the tourists who said they were FORCED to shop?

With difficulty, I have chosen the top 10 goofiest stories of 2010. All 10 of them are guaranteed Gooftastic, but I must say my favorite – and remember, this is true stuff – is the one about hunters in Italy who went out at night, without lights, to protect their super-secret troves of bounty, only to slide off of cliffs and die in the darkness in large numbers.

Oh. Did I mention they were hunting mushrooms? That’s just the kind of year it was.

beaver-cover-24010. Is that a frosty mug I see before me?

9. Then those animals FORCED me to shop!

8. We’re crashing! Can I still get Duty Free?

7. Honey, did my Beaver come in the mail?

6. Get the Lobo, Bobo, we’re drivin’ to Cabo!

5. Gosh, isn’t this a pretty dumb thing to do?

4. You here for business, or pleasure, Mr. Stinky?

3. Welcome to our new Viking Slave Class!

2. Toilet timer to eliminate waste?

1. And the morel of this story is…

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Top: Melvyn Koh (C) tries out Italian company Aviointeriors’ new aircraft ‘standing seat’ which has 23 inches of leg room, instead of the current economy class average of 30 inches, at the Aircraft Interiors Expo in Long Beach, California, September 15, 2010. REUTERS/Lucy Nicholson

Left: A Marine from the 3rd Battalion 6th Marines, uses a temporary built-up toilet in camp Sharwali, in Marjah district, Helmand Province, March 22, 2010. REUTERS/Asmaa Waguih

Right: Cover of “The Beaver.”

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Posted by Tweets that mention The 10 goofiest true stories of the year… | Analysis & Opinion | — | Report as abusive

I am going to go into work tomorrow and just find an excuse to use “gooftastic” in a sentence.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

I dont need an excuse… I can use gooftastic anytime I want… See, I just did!!! 😀
Hail Goofy Museum and Ye Olde Donut Shoppe!
Hail Cool Leaader Dude Charlie!
Hail Goofy Blog Guy who has had an easy year and made it easier for us too!!
and Hail all OE commentators for growing equally and immeasurably goofy this year!! 😀

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I believe these are all indisputable signs the world is coming to an end soon…

Either that, or somebody let the doors of the zoo open for a bit too long this year! Can’t really make up my mind, but just in case I think I’ll stockpile the doughnuts in my bomb shelter (mandatory in all Swiss building until the late 80s) and prepare for the worst.

Posted by justM | Report as abusive

Shra has unleashed a veritable Hail storm. 😉

Sorry I haven’t posted lately. I’ve been quite busy pressing keys, pushing buttons, being customer friendly and the like.

I wonder what this one does … ZAAAAPPPP!!! (ouch)

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

It’s not a sign of the apocalypse.

Rather, it’s proof for those above the average IQ that there are people out there actually below the line.

IOW, not all people are above average.

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

Consider the intelligence of the average person. Half the world is dumber than that.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

I believe that’s how the pitch for the first reality tv show began….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

And they have been tormenting us EVER since!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

The year’s award for “You-Crazy-Freaks” goes to Lamar and Lonnie!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

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Posted by Morning Market Update – A Quiet Friday? | Daily Trading Ideas | Report as abusive

“We have to pass the bill to know what’s in it”.

Posted by Sniper | Report as abusive