Great pie, Ma! You pick the kidneys yourself?
As an American, I grow weary of having to teach the world everything.
Once again, we have photos here from something called the World Scotch Pie Championship, in Scotland. There were hundreds of “pies” in competition.
But the thing is, these are not real pies. These are made with stuff like lamb and mutton and mince and – I’m not making this up – kidney.
Kidney? I’m sorry, but if you can put your name on a donor list for something and wait for a transplant, then it doesn’t belong in a pie.
Scotch pies are no more pies than cow pies are. I have to believe their name began as pure sarcasm, in recognition that you pretty much need to drink a bottle of Scotch before you can bear to gag one down.
I also believe their small round shape wasn’t designed for eating at all, but rather for clapping protectively against your ears if a bagpiper starts playing.
And I’ll just say one more thing. If this is what Scottish folks call pies, then Lord only knows what they think doughnuts are.
Top: Maurice Irvine poses for photographers with one of his pies after being named World Scotch Pie Champion in Dunfermline, Scotland January 6, 2011.
Right: Irvine looks up at some of his pies.
Left: A World Pie Championship judge examines the meat content of a scotch pie during the judging of the competition in Dunfermline, Scotland November 7, 2007.
REUTERS photos by David Moir