Lamar, the crash test dummy…

January 19, 2011

volvo crash 490

Lamar! Why am I talking to you on your cell phone instead of in person? I put you in charge of delivering our new electric car here at the auto show! It’s missing, and so are you!

AUTOSHOW/This place is full of journalists, cameras, live coverage, streaming video, all kinds of free publicity. Where’s my car?

Relax, Boss. Prepare to be dazzled!

Really? Try me.

Instead of just having the car there already, like all the other brands, I’m going to screech into the show at 80 miles an hour, stopping just inches away from a solid concrete barrier, to show how well she handles.

They’ll be talking about this thing for months!

AUTOSHOW/Lamar, I’m not sure about this. I can see you off in the distance now. You’re coming in VERY fast!

It’s okay, Boss, just step away from the barrier. This is SO exhilarating! Hey, Boss?

What, Lamar? Shouldn’t you be slowing down now?

You ever have your foot fall asleep at just the wrong time?

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Top: Volvo reveals a crash tested C30 electric vehicle during the press day for the North American International Auto show in Detroit, January 11, 2011.

Left: Volvo CEO Stefan Jacoby speaks in front of crash tested Volvo C30 electric car.

REUTERS photos by Mark Blinch

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If I crash having a crush on someone, what would you call me?

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by robert basler, Oddly Enough. Oddly Enough said: Lamar, the crash test dummy… […]

Posted by Tweets that mention Lamar, the crash test dummy… | Analysis & Opinion | — | Report as abusive

Lamar brought the Demo Derby to the Auto Show! Woo hoo!

In this tight economy, some banquet halls are closing. To fill the gap, funeral homes are now renting out space for weddings, proms and parties. I guess the death panel isn’t working up to snuff or the funeral homes wouldn’t have the free time. Anyhow, if the proms are going to be held at a funeral home, will the kids want to go in a hearse instead of a limo? Lamar could get a job as a driver if proms do take a turn for the hearse.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

You’re having a very good week, Onedoor…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Gotta hand it to the Volvo guys, after hearing about how BMW had one of their cars stolen, they figured they’d use a crashed vehicle as their demo model. If someone steals it they can claim insurance, insisting that the car was in perfect working condition.

They can also put crash test dummies into slinky silver suits and drape them over the car, in place of using actual human beings.

Sneaky. Cheap, but sneaky.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Lol!! That foot falling asleep line was brilliant, Mr.B! 😀

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

My Electric Slide reference didn’t make it past Mr. Spam Filter? Hmm… he must not like attending weddings.

No Lamar it’s 1.21 Jiggawatts, not 64 Kilowatts! And really, why would you want to time travel in a taxi anyway?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Yeah see that’s another thing Lamar messed up! It’s supposed to be 88mph. Not 80, not 38.4. In the words of the immortal Biff; “Hellllo McFly!”

Why is there a swimming pool under the car?

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

THE WHITE HATS DID IT! Johnson has the pictures.

Posted by wheelz | Report as abusive

And Unca Rastus is the very first victim of my brand new taser!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ouch…Painful blog! I was rearended yesterday by a Cell Phone Idiot who claimed “the sun got in his eyes” and he didn’t see the line of cars stopped for a left turn. I would swear that he was quickly erasing his “Recent Calls” list before the police showed up.

Posted by Moonshine | Report as abusive

Telephone records are subject to subpoena, if need be. Wonderful things, telephone records and subpoenies.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive