There’s something about a man in uniform

February 15, 2011


Quick quiz: The resplendent full dress uniform seen above, with blue lapels, gleaming buttons and rank stripes on the sleeves, will be worn by…

oscars raccoons 260a) the commander of the Sri Lankan navy.

b) members of the Raccoon Lodge.

c) Britain’s Prince William at his upcoming wedding.

d) waiters at a party for the Oscars.

Don’t feel bad, this one fooled me, too. These are indeed specially designed uniforms for waiters at the Governors Ball, part of the Academy Awards festivities.

At first, I wondered why they NEED special uniforms.

oscars uniform srilanka 320I mean, if I’m at that party and there’s a guy I haven’t seen in a movie and he’s carrying a tray of pigs in blankets, I’m going to figure he’s a waiter, right?

But then I remembered all those other stupid little Oscar categories that nobody cares about at all.

Readers, if you go to the ball, print out this photo and take it with you. It may save you from ordering a Harvey Wallbanger from some bozo who just won Best Achievement in Visual Effects.

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Top: A specially designed waiter’s uniform is displayed at a preview of the Governors Ball for the upcoming 83rd annual Academy Awards in Los Angeles, February 9, 2011. REUTERS/Phil McCarten

Right: Photo from “The Honeymooners”

Left: Vice Admiral TSG Samarasinghe (L), commander of the Sri Lankan navy, speaks with Sri Lanka’s President Mahinda Rajapaksa during ceremonies in Colombo, December 9, 2010. REUTERS/Dinuka Liyanawatte

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[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by robert basler, Oddly Enough. Oddly Enough said: There’s something about a man in uniform […]

Posted by Tweets that mention There’s something about a man in uniform | Analysis & Opinion | — | Report as abusive

A tray of pigs in a blanket = food – right? NOT! As Lady Gaga proved to us, tiny nuggets of mechanically separated meat medley could simply be a creative and delicious attempt at accessorizing, just as oversize eggs could be used as transportation devices.

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

What, no epualettes? No juanty cap?
It’s a travesty!
And where, exactly, do you stash the left-over doughnuts you take from the plates?

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

You have left over doughnuts, Nosmo? Really??
I for once, thought that was what the Srilankan commander would wear… and then my next guess was that it could be Prince William’s suit…

Really… anything is possible….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ah, the Racoon Lodge! And for duct tape adventures, the Possumm Lodge!

Silly Nosmo. They don’t take a doughnut or two from the plates. They simply say “Excuse me, must deliver these to that almost famous person in the back.” They get a plate full of doughnuts and a souvenier plate.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

That’s right, Nosmo. Where are the doughnut pockets!?!?

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

Thanks for your timely advice, Mr B. Per your instructions, I’ve printed out the photo of the waiter-duds so now I just have to sit tight and wait for my invitation to the Oscars Ball.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

@unca: Red Green is wonderful elective viewing for any woman who has lived with a man. A sense of humor works wonders. I do miss the show:)

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

@unca and onedoor: I too love the Red Green Show. Let us bow our heads for the Man’s Prayer.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

Okay, somebody needs to tell me who Red Green is. I don’t want to ask Lamar.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Red Green is the best! I watched it religiously as a kid, and nursed a secret guilty crush on Howard.

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

“If a woman don’t find you handsome, she should at least find you handy.” RG

Thanks, Unca. That would be nice. It may well be on the air in this area. I’m just not watching television at present.

Lady, do you think, could it be? That your Lamar is really a member of the Possum Lodge!

Maybe we can get the blog guy to have a Red Green Festival at the Museum! The perfect theme: Duct Tape and Doughnuts.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

BG: I think Lamar is at a lodge meeting somewhere in Canada. Meanwhile check your inbox. Possible a troll sent you a message regarding Red Green. Now, do I have to explain trolls, too? Get your mind out of Canada and into its neighbor. Look at the mitten. It is connected to Yooper Land by a biiiiiig bridge. And what live under bridges? Trolls! Rats. Now I’m homesick…

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

So far… I have not understood a word mentioned here… I am gonna google Red Green….
I must say, I am quite pleased with the fact that no one tried to teach!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

@Shra, if you know who Tim ‘the toolman’ Taylor was, Red Green was kinda like the Canadian version, only it was funny most of the time.

I just noticed how much Red Green looks like Randy Quaid.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

@Buck: why yes, I am weird, thank you.

@Nosmo: good show comparison!

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Yeah… I know Tim, the toolman!!! He was funny!! :)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

@ unca: re Possum Lodge Man’s Prayer–Excellent memory, but your quote is missing a sacred coordinate conjunction. Should read, “I am a man BUT I can change….” etc. The conjunction underscores the spiritual humility and desperate pathos of the Possum petitioners.
Calm down, Shra, and put your taser back in its holster: Nobody knows or cares what a coordinate conjunction is.

Posted by ladylala | Report as abusive

As long as they dont learn and you dont teach, lady..;)

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive