Bone appetite, everybody!
Okay, the headline on this story, “Ancient Brits ate dead and made skulls into cups,” pretty much says it all. I can’t improve on that.
Perhaps surprisingly, I’m going to skip right over the part about eating the dead. It would just be too easy to compare what British folks ate back then with what they eat now.
Instead, I’m going to zero in on the bit about making gruesome goblets from human skulls. What in the HELL was up with those Cro-Magnons?
“Earl! Get out the bone china, we’re havin’ the Hendersons for dinner.”
“Not so loud, Marsha, I really drank a skull full last night.”
“You’re makin’ me thirsty, Earl. Hand me another noggin of nog, will ya? “Dammit, you can’t do anything right! What are you, a Neanderthal?”
“These new kitchen shelves you built are too close together. See, your head isn’t even gonna fit there when the time comes!”
“Oh, quit your jawboning, Marsha! I got all the time in the world to adjust ‘em.”
“You think so? I got news for you, Mr. Flintstone! It’s already 13,000 BC and the numbers are gettin’ smaller, not bigger!”
“Party on, Baby! Can I put a head on that drink for ya?”