Bone appetite, everybody!

February 17, 2011

skull bowl 490

Okay, the headline on this story, “Ancient Brits ate dead and made skulls into cups,” pretty much says it all. I can’t improve on that.

Perhaps surprisingly, I’m going to skip right over the part about eating the dead. It would just be too easy to compare what British folks ate back then with what they eat now.

FLINTSTONESInstead, I’m going to zero in on the bit about making gruesome goblets from human skulls. What in the HELL was up with those Cro-Magnons?

“Earl! Get out the bone china, we’re havin’ the Hendersons for dinner.”

“Not so loud, Marsha, I really drank a skull full last night.”

“You’re makin’ me thirsty, Earl. Hand me another noggin of nog, will ya? “Dammit, you can’t do anything right! What are you, a Neanderthal?”

“These new kitchen shelves you built are too close together. See, your head isn’t even gonna fit there when the time comes!”

“Oh, quit your jawboning, Marsha! I got all the time in the world to adjust ‘em.”

“You think so? I got news for you, Mr. Flintstone! It’s already 13,000 BC and the numbers are gettin’ smaller, not bigger!”

“Party on, Baby! Can I put a head on that drink for ya?”

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Top: Ancient Britons devoured their dead and created gruesome goblets from the skulls of their remains, according to new research. REUTERS/ Natural History Museum Media Team/Handout

Cartoon characters Fred and Wilma Flintstone are featured on a float in the Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena, January 1, 2000. REUTERS/Rose Prouser

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19 comments

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The Brits eat the dead? Really?? Wonder if that’s what Cameron meant when talking about the Big Society….
More meat, per seat??
I got my taser handy, if at all required…

P.S:My dog’s named after Fred Flintstone….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

That gives new meaning to “we’re having the Hendersons for dinner.”

Posted by Billl | Report as abusive

Not really. That’s exactly the meaning I wanted it to have…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Lacking the OE mugs, they used what they had on hand. Off the shoulders rather than off the shelf.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Bring out your dead! No, not really, please.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

You may have a point, Spin. If it was really from 13,000 BC then wouldn’t it SAY 13,000 BC somewhere on it?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

so Ed Gein was just living in the past?

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive

No offense, Spin, but you seem to have quite a lot of spare time on your job. I’m guessing you’re maybe an air traffic controller or an ER triage doctor or something like that?

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

There was an episode of the Twilight Zone where aliens from another planet landed on earth. At the end of the episode as many liberal people were boarding the space craft one of them received a call.

The caller told him that they had translated the aliens language and the book they were given was titled “How to Serve Mankind”.

“IT”S A COOKBOOK!!!” he screamed.

Posted by Billl | Report as abusive

Way to spoil it, Bill! I was going to watch that episode tonight!

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

So, you’re sayin’ headcheese was invented in Britain? Was that how they got their brawn?

I drink to your health
From a cup made from your skull.
Is that ironic?

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

bone? err? what? :D

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Fwd, you make me laugh everytime with the OBVIOUS! :D
Spin, I love how you match things up… I have often wondered about the skullcap… and about the cap Muslims wear during praying…
Thanks for clearing them! :D

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I bet the ancient Brits had plenty of skeletons in their closet then.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

@Shra: At your service, my dear. :-)

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Which is an island in Scotland, Spin, which brings us back to the subject of the story…

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

“All we know about past cultures for sure is that they were skeletons who lived underground…”

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

I know a fictional skeleton who kicks but*!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Umm.. well, no, actually, Unca…I am talking about Skullduggery Pleasant… he is beyond awesome!!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive