Really? You’ve had no professional training?

March 6, 2011

fashion insane this 490

Lamar, I’m at the end of my rope. We have to find cheaper models for our fashion shows. We’ve tried zombies, dead people, puppets….

FRANCE-FASHION/What we need is a group of women who will make their own outfits, do their own hair and makeup, and strut the runway, all for free.

Relax, Boss, I’ve found exactly what you just described.

Who are they, Lamar? Who are these amazing, generous fashion angels?

The criminally insane, Boss.

Excuse me?

I just showed up over at the State Prison, signed 20 gals out on day passes, put ’em in a dressing room with fabric and makeup, and voila!

Lamar, you’re a genius! But are they good models? Do they have a “Come hither” glance?

fashion insane crap 240Uh, if by “Come hither” you mean, “Come one step closer and the bank manager gets it,” then they sure do, Boss!

You say you signed out 20 women, Lamar? I only see six or seven out on the runway.

Oh, that’s my bad, Boss. When I gave them the stuff to make their outfits, I shouldn’t have included scissors.

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Models present creations from the Vivienne Westwood Fall-Winter 2011/2012 women’s ready-to-wear fashion collection during Paris Fashion Week March 4, 2011. REUTERS photos by Benoit Tessier

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Black crap on their lips? What, were they giving kisses to an exhaust pipe? Pic #2 – I’ve heard of pear-bodies, I’ve even seen a few, but that is ridiculous.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

The one looks like she smooched with Eugene “TH” Johnson.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Lol!! The girl in the 3rd pic, actually says she loves crap…oh, I know, she’s Eugene’s better half…she definitely is better than Eugene….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Wait – is that an “I ‘heart’ Crap” button that girl is wearing? WTH?

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Yay! Time travelling Victorian chimney sweep girlies! That explains the scrawniness AND the soot. Not the “I love crap” badge though…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Hooray! I just knew that my look would become popular someday!

Posted by vwgal | Report as abusive

She loves crap? Well, duh.

Posted by slick9 | Report as abusive

Yeah, talk about stating the obvious….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

Wait a second…

There are 13 missing models from the state pen, and they have scissors?

Does that mean they are “running with scissors”? :)

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

Wenches without wrenches? How horrible!

Posted by inebgreen | Report as abusive

Dave sees a pear in the second pic. I (unfortunately) see something a little more phallic. It’s a bit disturbing.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Is it just me or do they look like they have run over by Muammar’s Club Car?
Shame about the tyre marks all over their faces.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

They are wearing the new Gene Simmons line of makeup: KISS of CRAP.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

…I have two pair of scissors. One for each hand; but, I am not related to Edward…

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

awwee cute Zombies…NOT 😀

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

One, you mean to say you can cut with both hands… that’s.. something!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Why fake facial hair on girl models when they can do with men in the first place is beyond me. Oh, and don’t tell me these clothes are meant for women hence modelled by women – I have yet to see women wearing phallic/pear-shaped clothes out on the road.

Hmm..then again, we haven’t got Wal-Mart in Malta.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

Shra: don’t cut more than a tiny line with the left hand. It really does require thumb strength and coordination. Stabbing and running with scissors in both hands, is another story. Although the story doesn’t involve running from a stabbing:)

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

If new means weirder, then yes, Spin.. it is…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Unca, you are too kind!

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive