News, but not the serious kind
Can I pull the plug during a shutdown?
Blog Guy, this federal government shutdown has me really worried. I had hoped to get rid of my do-nothing son-in-law, but I wonder if those Government Death Panels will be answering their phones.
Not to worry. Essential services like the military, airport security and Death Panels will continue to operate.
Death Panels are considered essential services?
You bet. We can’t have people living longer than they’re supposed to, can we?
No, I guess not, but how will they get paid?
That’s not a problem. The Death Panels work largely on tips.
We’re supposed to TIP them? How much?
If the service was good, 18 percent is considered nice. Give them less if they leave a huge mess.
Okay Blog Guy, what if the Death Panels continue to work during a shutdown but folks don’t know to call them? Where will they find people to dispose of?
Congress will still be in session. You do the math.
An actor performs during a parade at the Barranquilla’s carnival in Colombia, March 5, 2011. REUTERS/Jose Miguel Gomez
A model presents a creation for Beijing Institute of Fashion Technology and Taiwan Shin Chien University Graduates Collection during China Fashion Week in Beijing, March 25, 2011. REUTERS/Jason Lee