You said my butt looks WHAT?

April 15, 2011

fashion gun 490

Lonnie, what were we thinking? I KNEW we shouldn’t have booked a fashion show in Mexico, what with the drug wars, the gang hits, the brazen shootouts all over the place!

fashion vest 240It’ll be fine, Boss. Some of the models want to wear Kevlar vests on the runway, but those are pretty fashionable these days.

Well, I don’t know, Lon. Did the girls demand any other kind of security?

Oh, you know, they all want to carry 9 mm pistols. I said fine, what could it hurt?

Sure, what could possibly go wrong with arming a couple dozen prima donna models with semiautomatic weapons? Say Lonnie, have you seen Lamar around?

Yeah Boss, he just went backstage to tell Hulga her thighs are looking kind of chunky.

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Top: A model takes aim with a gun during the Expo Seguridad Mexico 2011 security fair in Mexico City April 12, 2011.

Left: A model poses during the Expo Seguridad.

REUTERS photos by Jorge Dan Lopez

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Ahhhh, classic. Hold the pistol right-handed, aim with left eye. I’ve met maybe two people who could actually shoot that way – everyone else who tries it can’t understand why they can’t hit the side of a barn from 25 m. Aaaaaany way, liking the body armor in #2 pic. Nice fashion accessories.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Oh, the first pic is of a model?
Well, in this case, at least these models have had plenty to eat and dont look like zombies!

Three cheers for REAL women!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Thanks thanks thanks bundle of thongs for this weekend!! 😉

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

alternate captions for the top photo:
“Join the OE Blog Network…OR ELSE”
“Go ahead, make my day…Join the OE Blog Network”
“Not a member of the OE Blog Network? Ya gotta ask yourself one question. Do you feel lucky? Well do ya, punk?”

happy Friday!!! 😀

Posted by GeorgiaPeach | Report as abusive

I find this kind of fashion to be very arresting.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Good luck getting her top off! 😉

Posted by justCAM | Report as abusive

You made me feel so UNOBSERVANT, Dave! I had to get my S&W .38 out (unload it) and check my aim against the photo. Good call. I just hope Shra doesn’t zap us both.

Posted by Moonshine | Report as abusive

You know, I wouldn’t over-think this one. I’m pretty sure the model isn’t….

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive

I second Shra’s comment! 😀

Something about that model wearing Kevlar that’s enticing. It’s like she is saying “You have to go through my hard candy shell to reach my smooth, creamy caramel center.” That’s a challenge I would accept! 😉

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Moon, as long as you didnt learn anything….

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

You need doughnuts, Mr.Pilot…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

I dunno; does it seem kinda odd that the protective vest doesn’t cover the model’s navel? I know it’s covering the vital organs, but it seems a bullet to the gut would be pretty dangerous.

And the most important question to ask about the model in the second picture is: “Are those fish nets bullet-proof as well?”

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

@Moon – a revolver? You’re so old-fashioned…

By the way, for anybody looking for a Kate fix today, someone found a jelly bean with her “likeness” on it. No kidding. As i read the story, I thought I must be on the OEBN, but alas, it was on a competitor website.

If it gets through Mr. Spam filter: oyal-wedding/kate-middleton/8450314/Jell y-bean-resembling-Kate-Middleton-to-fetc h-500.html

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

@Shra, yes my dear I do.

@GeorgiaPeach, if I may add to your tag lines..
“Cease and desist, or face joining the Oddly Enough blog network!”
and to pay homage to RoboCop, “Dead or alive, you’re coming with me… to join the Oddly Enough blog network!”

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

Man, and I thought unhooking a bra strap was tricky.
Hmm … maybe I should get a vest for my teenage daughter.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

The first model is going to have a heck of a time hitchhiking if she fires a gun like that.

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

Models in fishnets
with automatics and vests.
Watch the hands, buddy.

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive

In the interests of research (and hey, it’s Friday), I went and got my gun from the thigh rig on the shop dummy in the hallway to play with, and I would have thought that right handed people would instinctively aim with the right eye…?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Dave, sorry for the delay in responding…but: Old fashioned, yes. Simple: yes. Dead-on: yes, too. Sleeping good at night: priceless.

Posted by Moonshine | Report as abusive

I’ve seen several of the local police officers in my neighborhood. The women would look fine in the shorts and fishnets; but, I’d be giggling myself silly if the men showed up in that uniform!

@Nosmo: just get your daughter a can of pepper foam or a chastity belt:)

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

@CrowGirl – I would discuss the concepts, but I know the zapper would get me. I’ve been skating a bit close to the edge, if you know what I mean. :)

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Dave, maybe you could explain in a hypothetical way that doesn’t seem to involve learning? :)

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Maybe Zen, Dave. Realization, not learning.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

Well Crowgirl, hypothetically speaking, if you want to determine your dominant eye, you could, if you were so inclined, hold your index finger up and with both eyes open, place the tip onto an object. Then close one eye or the other – if the fingertip is still on the object, then you have your dominant eye open. That is, in theory and hypothetically speaking, the eye you should use to shoot with. It is possible to shoot cross eye-hand, but it is usually better to shoot same side, even if you have to learn it. Maybe. Or I could be making the whole thing up for entertainment purposes only. *ducking zapper*

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Thanks for that Dave; I am sitting in the kitchen with a glass of dandelion wine and a gun and not learning anything. Honest. And it’s not loaded, and anyway it’s an airsoft weapon, so it’s all fine…

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

@Dave, I am left handed but when I play paintball I usually sight with my right eye whether I hold the marker on my left or right. Of course with a spray-and-pray style of shooting it doesn’t really matter what eye I sight with. :p

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

I was trained to shoot the Colt .45 with both eyes open. That way you don’t lose your depth perception. One eye, usually the right, became dominant. But we had to be able to shoot both left and right handed. When shooting left handed, I had to close my right eye. If any organ has the ability to throw off your aim, the eyes have it.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

And, in many police shoot-outs and in urban combat, one may have to shoot and move, shoot and move. Closing one eye impairs vision for a short time.

Posted by DoctorDoll | Report as abusive

To quote Denny Crane, “Thank God for guns, heh, Jerry?” o4

Posted by Moonshine | Report as abusive

No form of “hypothetically speaking” is gonna undermine the fact that there has been some teaching going on here…
Shall I let the zapping commence?

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Shra, will you keep both eyes open while you zap? How does that affect your aim?

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

I have a super zapper, Malt.. I just need to point and my zapper sting will find its target… very up-to-date technology, you see… sure helps!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Spin – that would be useless, her super zapper sting would still find you. Useless hiding. Just like you’re fighting Chuck Norris. This sure is scary.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

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