This gunman goes into a bar, see…

May 18, 2011

I’m not sure when our state lawmakers  began competing to pass the most wacky weapons laws,  but it’s getting pretty hard to keep up with them.

To recap, in recent days we’ve seen both Utah and Arizona vote to create official state firearms. Meanwhile, lawmakers in Maine voted to legalize switchblade knives, but only for one-armed residents.

That brings us to Ohio, where the house of representatives has just approved laws that would give people more rights to carry concealed weapons, including one that allows folks to carry guns into  bars.

Jeez, I hardly know where to begin. My feeling is, if you’re going into a bar where you think you might need a gun, maybe you should upgrade to a nicer bar. Or else just drink at work, like everybody else.

But here’s what really interests me. The Ohio bill prohibits the person carrying the gun from drinking alcohol at the same time.

So wait a minute. Here’s a law aimed at helping people who want to go to a bar that is so sleazy they need to take a gun, but they’re not supposed to drink when they get there?

I have to ask. Has Ohio gone one step beyond the designated driver, and created the designated shooter?

“Herb, the rest of us are gonna get hammered tonight. You just have a Mountain Dew and sit there with your .44 magnum to protect us, okay?

“Oh and Herb, if my boss comes here looking for me, you know what to do…”

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Top: Patrons hug at a bar in Mingo Junction, Ohio April 7, 2011. REUTERS/Eric Thayer

Right: A model presents a swimwear during a fashion show in Budapest April 19, 2007. REUTERS/Laszlo Balogh

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This will give a new meaning to ordering ‘shooters’ in a bar.

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive

Do you think that’s the state firearm of Hungary in that model’s garter belt? Or is she just happy to see someone? :)

Posted by Jibberish | Report as abusive

I say, the gun looks quite trendy actually…
That gal would make quite a splash…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Is there a gun in either of those pictures? :)

I knew about the Ohio law; it’s just another reason not to go into a bar, especially in Ohio.

In fact, I’m so glad I don’t even go into bars these days.

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive

I thought the last photo was a picture of one of the servers who works for that new bar and grill chain that just set up in Ohio – Shooters.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

The message of the last picture is quite clear: don’t go in a swimming pool without your gun, either.

Posted by grok | Report as abusive

Clearly the only reason you can’t drink whilst holding your weapon is because it’s REALLY hard to juggle a gun, beer, cigarette, and the guy’s (or gal’s) bum next to you. We only have TWO HANDS people!

Posted by sarabelle | Report as abusive

This law is only new in Ohio. Many other states have the option to carry in places that allow alcohol consumption. Such as Chipotle or other restaurants that server alcohol. Not just bars.

Posted by NEWTEWT | Report as abusive

I don’t see it, I don’t see it, oh wait, I see it 😀

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive

Um, why is Lamar hanging out taking pictures of patrons in bars? In Ohio? Doe anything good ever happen in Ohio? Wait, WKRP?

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive

Is it really any safer to have someone “Do the Dew” with a .44 on their hip? If the commercials for Mountain Dew are any indication one might be inclined to do some busting of the cap…. to the X-TREEEEEMME!

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive

You can’t say you didn’t know it was coming: they aren’t there to drink; they are there to shoot pool.

Second photo, gal could also be shooting pool.

Pass the doughnuts, and get the lead out.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive

Oo, good comment on Arizona!

I’m for guns in bars, but only if visible, and only if wearing a bikini. I would apply that equally to men and women.

Posted by flamenquito | Report as abusive

Flamen, men in bikinis??
Umm.. I dont think thats a very good idea…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive

Ohio has a new state sport – sabrage using a .44

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive

Argh, ash on the baize! Can someone please usher that man away from the pool table?

Posted by CrowGirl | Report as abusive

Thanks Spin, a haiku was just what this item needed.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive