Oddly Enough Blog
News, but not the serious kind
Then the queen says to this fishmonger…
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I say, my good man, are you the local fishmonger?
You’ve come to the right plaice, your majesty. I’m the o-fish-al monger!
Well, I must say, there is a vile odor here!
You smelt something bad? Say, did you come to carp, or are you here just for the halibut? Get it? Halibut? I got a million of ‘em!
One gathers you must be some sort of village simpleton, laughing at jokes such as those.
You could be right, your majesty. I’ll mullet over.
Now see here! I am growing very angry!
I’m not doing it on porpoise, your highness. It’s probably just your minnow-pause.
Phillip, please make a note to have this man beheaded…
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Britain’s Queen Elizabeth meets fishmonger Pat O’Connell at the English Market in Cork May 20, 2011. REUTERS/Maxwell’s/POOL
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I imagined the following after HM speaks the last sentence..
She then grabs the nearest salmon and thrusts it right into Mr. O’Connell’s mouth… wiping off her gloved hands on his shirt ofcourse..
I’m guessing another act he’d pull off is to animate the fish like a ventriloquist would animate his puppets, only he’d just move their mouth…
“Good morning Your Majesty, I’m Feel the Eel! When I grow up I want to be a wall-mounted eel and sing God Save the Eels”
All the big mouth bass are in awe of that guy. Goofy Face Museum and Doughnut Shop winner of the month!
Overheard nearby:
“Mum, I see you found the only non-Irish business in the whole city. You’ll feel right at home!”
“So this fishwife walks into a bar…”
“Sorry, mum, my face has been stuck in this rictus since I groped the electric eel”
… and paraphrasing…
“Care for some fish balls, mum?”
“Balls”, said the Queen. “If I had them, I’d be king!”
Just noticed your new “author profile” shot, Mr B. Very nice, I must say. So did you really go to clown camp or did you sneak off to “get some work done” like the celebrity crowd?
Thanks for noticing, Ladylala. I may not be too smart, but putting on new sunglasses doesn’t take me more than a day or two…
Cool, RB is Harrison Ford of the blog world
I like how the fish are making goofy faces too. I like BG’s new pic but, my favorite part of his profile is the Whatever in his resume. Hey! My sister worked at the Whatever store in the mall!
It looks like the decoration on her hat is made from fish bones and scales, as well as feathers.
Very George Peppard, BG!
I’m at a loss for fish puns, Bob. Sorry to disappoint you. I suppose you’ll ban me from ever posting again and demand your autographed books be returned immediately.
By the way…I’m really jonesing for one of those freaking pretzels from the Amish market in Cockeysville…I don’t suppose you’d mail me one….once a week for the rest of my life…..
So, none of you commenting got caught up in the rapture either, eh? Anybody know where I can unload a couple gross of handbaskets?
JustK, you’re welcome here anytime, with or without fish puns. And thanks for pretending I can actually write my name.
RB: did you get a new haircut to go with the glasses? Very nice photo.
If the poor man is beheaded, do not order the Fillet O’Fishmonger Sandwich from McDonalds no matter how many fries come with it1
@Jazz: loved the comment! Somehow, I don’t think the handbaskets were going up in the rapture. Those people sized handbaskets tend to take the down elevator.
Hey Mr B, how come no ‘trout pout’ in the vacation snap?
Is there an app for that?
Another plausible discussion between fishmonger and the queen…
Fishmonger: “Oh, so those are feathers on your hat?? I thought they were lobster claws like these, look! Hahaha..And if I put these claws on mine, we’d be twins! Oh God I’m so funny”…
“Gimme back that Filet-O-Fish;
gimme that fish!
Gimme back that Filet-O-Fish;
gimme that fish!”
Mr. Fishmonger should have cncealed one of the singing fish in the display. Or, the way he’s laughing, maybe he did!
http://www.howstuffworks.com/singing-fis h.htm
you’ll all feel bad when you find out his face is stuck like that permanently, can you imagine how his wife feels?!
Malt, that reminds me of one of my favourite jokes.
The fishes apparently have a twin, the Queen herself. Is she trying to imitate them in that first picture?
CrowGirl, care to share?
I’d love to Malt, but it’s kind of a visual gag…