Oddly Enough Blog

News, but not the serious kind

Wouldn’t hanging them be more humane?

May 31, 2011

Blog Guy, I read somewhere that you’re an authority on prisoner rehabilitation programs.

Well, yes, but only the really wacky ones that make no sense at all to me. For instance, here’s one where they teach prisoners to play bagpipes.

No way.

It’s true. They take hardened criminals, who are already a not very popular group of people, and teach them to be even more irritating. And it isn’t just bagpipes. Some of them learn to play large drums.

What’s the theory behind this program?

According to our photo caption, the idea is to “involve them in various social functions so as to change their mindset.” As we all know, annoying people until they snap is a great way to make useful contacts in the outside world.

Do they get a chance to use their music to practice social interaction while still in prison?

Indeed they do. Here on the left you can see a group of them thumping their drums right outside the women’s section of the prison, hoping to meet some ladies.

How did that work out for them?

After being subjected to about four relentless hours of drumming, the female prisoners burst through the door in a frenzied mob armed with sharpened metal bedposts. What happened next wasn’t pretty.

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Top: Inmates play bagpipes as part of their routine training inside Kotbhalwal central jail in Jammu May 20, 2011. Jail authorities have formed a 20-member pipe band of a team of prisoners who are being trained to play and perform musical instruments. Once the band is ready, they will be sent to perform at weddings and other social functions, a jail superintendent said. The main aim of creating the pipe band is to develop relations of these prisoners with the rest of the outside world and to involve them in various social functions so as to change their mindset, the superintendent said.

Left: Sana Ullah, 62, who is serving a life term, plays a bagpipe during a routine practice inside Kotbhalwal central jail in Jammu, May 20, 2011.

Left: Inmates play drums as part of their routine training inside Kotbhalwal central jail in Jammu May 20, 2011.

REUTERS photos by Mukesh Gupta

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Comments

Obviously, J&K has a different perspective on “cruel and unusual” punishment.

Posted by Dave_not_dave | Report as abusive
 

… Once the band is ready, they will be sent to perform at weddings and other social functions…
Is this their version of a ‘scared straight’ progam? They send out inmates to torture you with bagpipes to remind you that crime doesn’t pay, and that this could happen to you?

Could be worse though, they could have had an accordian section, be wearing kilts, and have Donald Trump as their patron.

Posted by Nosmo_King | Report as abusive
 

LOL! I would like to hear what happens if they are sent to a wedding… :D
Possibly even see Lamar catching a few “arresting” shots :D

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Mr. B., the leading authority on prisoner rehabilitation programs. You can follow is work in his other publications “Feng Shui for your 5×8″ and “Life on the Outside: It’s OK to Drop the Soap Again”.

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Spin, if only u knew of ALL the things we have adopted from the British Raj…

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

LOL scarily funny :D

Posted by fwd079 | Report as abusive
 

@Shra, please enlighten us. :)

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

Can’t you just see these guys as the band in “The Wedding Singer”?

Posted by AllThatJazz | Report as abusive
 

Is “Female Block” anything like writer’s block?

Posted by skeres | Report as abusive
 

No skeres, I believe it’s like H & R Block, but with just women accountants.

Posted by rcbasler | Report as abusive
 

Oh, I’d love to pay them to play “The Chicken Dance” at some reception. It would be too perfect, and now I have to attempt to stop my laughter!

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive
 

And how about the people that hear that? Should they also be punished? :)

Best regards,
SimpleGuy

Posted by SimpleGuy | Report as abusive
 

@Simple: I promise that I wasn’t trying to punish or torture anyone. Well, at least not with the bagpipes…

It is just that “The Chicken Dance” tends to make me mildy hysterical, and thought of it done with bagpipes was pushing me right to the edge!

Dada dada dada dum, dada dada dada dum, dada dada dada dum, skreeeeech skreeeeeeech skreeeeeeeeech skreeeeeeeeeech.

Posted by Onedoor | Report as abusive
 

One, you soooooo make me smile!!

Posted by Shra | Report as abusive
 

Oh…darn it BG, you should have published this earlier! We (my fiancee and I) just booked our wedding entertainers. These fellows would have been a great alternative. I wonder though, would they be allowed to roam free at the venue or would they be bunched up together and tied somewhere?

Posted by Malteser | Report as abusive
 

@Onedoor, ha ha nice one! :D

Posted by iflydaplanes | Report as abusive
 

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